Posted by akc on August 31, 2001, at 16:42:18
In reply to Compassion Does Not Mean Agreement, posted by Zo on August 31, 2001, at 16:15:42
>
> It means refraining from judgement, attack, abandonment.
>
> You know. All those things you would hate having done to you.
>
> ZoMy two cents post refrained from those things. I felt that Sal's posts on gays and lesbians did those things. I lose compassion for those who would condemn me without knowing me -- who would say that because I am ______, I am a sinner, condemn to hell. That judgment lacks compassion, and in return, I find it hard to return compassion. Especially, when the person flaunts that belief in my face. I work very hard to remain civil, even when I am angry. To play by the rules.
All I ask of you is to see it from my side also. Sal may be acting out because of something going on in his life, but his actions hurt -- his choice of words strike a wound in me (and probably others on this board) as much as some others' words might strike a wound in him. Your running to his defense -- drawing a sword -- lashing out -- just adds to my wounds.
When I wrote my two cents on religion, I was trying not to strike out at Sal. I was really trying to give my viewpoint on how the issue should be handled in general on the board -- where it belonged and didn't belong. I have reread that post several times today, and can't see where I provoked. This is a huge triggering issue for me. If I thought I could win the battle, I would fight for no religious talk on any of the boards. I was trying for what I thought was a logical solution -- so Vulcan of me.
So I'll gain compassion for Sal when I start seeing it in him towards me -- when I begin to be treated with some respect -- when I am not treated as a person who is condemned to hell for just being a full fledged out and out lesbian. It is hard to have compassion for someone who believes that about you.
akc
poster:akc
thread:1881
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20010718/msgs/1906.html