Posted by J Kelly on April 1, 2016, at 15:53:06
In reply to will you keep your feelings to yourself?, posted by swim on April 1, 2016, at 14:58:16
> Hi!
Hi swim! I'm listening!
>
> I just wanted somebody to let know of how disastrous i felt today, i even can't believe a person could feel like this, just acting normal but how i feel inside this is unimaginable, this even can't be but in words. This was the hardest day among the hard days. This can't be even real, if the Nardil isn't working, i feel like i being tortured inide my own mind and i can't escape.Please know you are not alone! I often have days like this. You just say this can't be , but it is. I know. But keep the hope. I've experienced long remissions due to meds etc. This can happen for you!
> I really don't know what to do anymore, i even don't bother to tell about how really really terrible i feel, because i know they can do nothing to help me. This can't even be described in words, I mean how something like this could even be possible?
I KNOW. It sucks but hang on cause the next med/treatment/etc. may work!
>
> I started Nardil 3 months ago and again the first 2 months were amazing- i was feeling alive, not suffering, not in pain anymore, but it always comes back, the pain, it comes back, i mean it goes away for a short while but it still comes back, it doesn't mater how much i want it to stay away. I have untreatable persistent depression, which without nardil has no escape, i feel so depressed even writing it, but i just needed to say it out!Why did you stop taking Nardil?
> It's only been couple of months brake from the depression (i even don't want to see this word anymore, more less type it)after getting back on Nardil and and feeling so undescribably horrible that i haven't even find cognitive power to express my self about how i feel and to post anywhere. At the moment i'm upstarts writing this and i hear my brother and his girlfriend laughing downstairs enjoying a movie and i just can't understand why i can't enjoy something like this, why am i so different?
Believe me you are NOT alone! Every depressed person just wants to be that "normal" person laughing at a joke/ a movie/ a pet whatever.
>
> This went off subject but do you tell other people about how you feel, can they help you? I mean i usually act just normal, i don't know why i do this, i should be crying and asking for an ambulance, but i dont.Oh do I know this well. I am the master at acting "normal". Its exhausting. Its your depression talking and you WILL find a solution.
So Nardil didn't work long term? What about Parnate? Emsam? There are MANY other meds and med combos to try. Don't panic.
Feel free to babble mail me if you are in crisis.
Jade
poster:J Kelly
thread:1087731
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20160331/msgs/1087734.html