> Hi Scott,
Hi. :-)
Long time, no see.
> It's nice to see you on the board still as I've always found your posts really encouraging, helpful and informative.
Thanks. I sometimes wonder if others feel the same way. I kinda don't think so. I generally don't get responsess to the threads I start, even when it is a request for help. Perhaps I come off as being a megalomaniac.
Oh, well.
> I am taking my medication in the hope that one day something better (even a cure) will come along. The state of being feels unbearable without medication.
What features of your depression do medications mitigate?
I feel that I have gone as far as I can with pharmacotherapy. I might add NAC in a few weeks. It is likely to take several months to work if it is going to work at all.
> I have tried rTMS years ago in Vancouver and it didn't seem to do anything and I tried 8 treatments of ECT (4 bilateral) which didn't seem to do anything either.
Supposedly a full trial of ECT comprises 12 - 15 treatments.
> But one thing I would say is that when I came round after each treatment I felt particularly horrible, like I'd been somewhere not very nice in my own head.
Was the core depression worse, or was this something different present in addition to depression?
> I seem to remember you saying that you had tried ECT and felt quite good for about half an hour and then nothing after that so I'm surprised you are optimistic about Deep rTMS.
I never tried any type of TMS. However, if I am going to give it a try, I want to use the best available. I'm not going through two courses of treatments. dTMS makes more sense for me if the presentation of comparative data showing its superiority is accurate and repeatable.
> I have been following the DBS trials quite closely as it is something I might consider when they know more about who it works for and which areas to target. Afterall, if you had the operation which area would you want them to target the anterior cingulate, the nucleous accumbens, or any of the other areas that they are experimenting with?
I agree with everything you said here.
> I'm sure I primarily suffer from some kind of existential anxiety rather than depression
You would be surprised just how much severe biogenic depression can feel like an existential crisis, especially when there is some anxiety present. Depression can change the content and perception of one's own thoughts.
> as I don't tend to cry a lot
Neither do I. My affect is too flat and there is psychomotor retardation. I usually don't have the energy to cry.
> and feel sad with it
The qualifiers for depressive disorder can include:
1. Sadness or depressed mood
and/or
2. Lack of interest or pleasure
For the most part, #2 qualifies me for a depressive mood disorder. However, earlier in my history melancholy, agitation, and anxiety were present.
> mainly agitated and anxious
Do you respond at all to tricyclics or SNRIs?
What has been your history of reactions to Nardil and Parnate?
> I have been considering VNS but you hear so few positive reports from it, I'm not sure it is worth the bother.
One of my doctors likes it. Perhaps they have refined the protocol.
Do you think there might be any bipolarity involved in your case?
> Denise
- Scott
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this signature | Show by default | Change to hide (next time)Some see things as they are and ask why.
I dream of things that never were and ask why not.
- George Bernard Shaw