Posted by floatingbridge on September 14, 2011, at 22:55:01
In reply to Re: How long is a fair trial? » floatingbridge, posted by Dinah on September 13, 2011, at 12:22:36
> If it is at all helpful...
All your posts were helpful :-). I've been too down to respond adequately, so first off, thank you. I spoke with my husband and got his perspective. Indeed, more depressed, way less 'joy'
So I took your thoughts (after letting them sit) along with my and my husbands observations today to the pdoc. I was pleasantly surprised, and if I may thank you again, I was able to have a discussion I don't think I would have been able to before.
>
> I discussed this with my therapist today, because it touched on something we had discussed recently in therapy. He says that there are those who believe that intensity of feeling and the accompanying brain state can become addictive in a way, so that the brain craves the intensity - even negative intensity - when it is withdrawn. And that if someone can ride out that
period of craving, the brain can readjust to the lowered intensity, and the craving and feelings of flatness can decrease. I'm paraphrasing, and I'm not sure how well I'm doing it.
>My pdoc said this differently, but very much agreed with this and your former post. The agitation, the accustom feeling of intense feeling has been reduced, and that can be very therapeutic. While it can push me into a low, such as a flattening anhedonia, this has been for some patients a readjustment to a new, more 'normal' range. That my mood will pick up.
He believes that AP use in general for non-psychotic patients needs to be revisited every few months. He does not necessarily see this risperdone therapy as continuous especially in light of my depressive symptoms. He understood your-- anonymous friend :-) --use of risperdone PRN under these circumstances as correct usage. That is, as one who has 'reset'.
> I always assumed that what flatness I felt was a symptom of my underlying depression. Gradually it passed. I think my therapist encourages me to feel, or perhaps to live in the real world instead of in my brain, by playing emotional songs or watching emotional movies that I could not have tolerated without pain when I was overaroused.
> Even happy songs irritated my nerves at my most agitated.
This detail really spoke to me. That is how I am, and I suppose it was this small, personal detail that turned the key in my understanding of what the heck I might be doing.
>
> For what it's worth. :) I thought I'd pass it on.
>
> And yes, you do seem more grounded and less desperate. Although I also have the impression you've been around here less. I had hoped it was because you were feeling better, but
perhaps that's a sign of apathy.
>
> As little as I like headon meeting of problems, in the long run I suffer less distress when I do attempt it.Thanks, Dinah.
So like reading the stocks, Emsam resumes it's all-time high of 9mg while risperdone remains a steady .5mg nightly.
All the talk of topamax and stabilizers and AED's were put to rest (whew) with a modest trial of 300mg gabapentin nightly.
My gosh, I was so dreading this appointment.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I'm tired, so I hope the typos are not outrageous and I managed to decently respond.
:-)
I dig a pony.
poster:floatingbridge
thread:996560
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110914/msgs/996803.html