Posted by gunhild on September 14, 2011, at 8:16:27
Hi everyone!
First I'd like to thank everyone for sharing their knowledge and personal experiences on this board.I've been on california rocket fuel for about 2 years, effexor (225mg) and remeron (30mg).
Last summer something very strange happened...
I felt like sh*t so that day I just popped caffeine pills and drank coca cola like crazy.. Probably got over 2.5g of caffeine in my body throughout the day.
Thought.. Maybe somethings good happen...As soon as the first caffeine began to kick in (a few hundred milligrams) I noticed that my sense of smelling became HIGHLY enhanced.. I'm totally serious.. Like every aspect of that sense was enhanced! It was horrible.. Felt such strange odours I never smelled before.
I continued to ingest caffeine and a strong feeling of "It feel like I'm living in a dream" came upon me.
Couldnt sleep well so I was pretty sleep deprived that night.When I woke up I had INTENSE energy and I didnt feel any pain at all. But I felt very paranoid. Everything felt surreal and sort of like living in a dream.
I felt like this for a few days and I now know that what I experienced was a Full blown mania.. It was INTENSE STRONG energy I felt. I Felt parnoid like hell, everybody watching, knows everything, for but after a day maybe a big bomb of euphoria was added to my mania. I never ever felt anything similar. It was pure magic.
This episode hanged on a few days but later faded out.
Sinse then I several times tried to pop a mega dose of caffeine, about 2 grams. As you can understand I felt like sh*t from that ammount. A fell like sh*t for 3 days.. Hard to sleep, anxious, surreal, paranoid, that sense smelling thing.
That caffeine dose was like an instant phsychosis to my mind. Felt horrible.But on the THIRD day.. Boom!
Woke up like a new human beeing. Euphoric lile hell.. Everything was SHARP and VIVID. Could process information very easy and much stronger than usual.
This was not as unsteady like the other episode. In this I had control but I feelt soooo awesome it was hard to hide it sometimes.I tried to induce this several times through the same way.
Mega dose
caffeine - 3 (always 3) days later, BOOM, euphoric hypomania. A magic feeling. Those who had it knows excatly what I talk about. Always euphoric.These episodes lasted about 3-5 days and sometimes I crashed and other times it just faded away.
One time I felt moderate depression when I woke up and then I toke some caffeine 250mg.. A little while later it was like someone turned on a "you feel f*ck*ng awesome" switch in my brain.
I even induced euphoric hypomania by take 150-250mg doses of caffeine 3 times per day. A few days later the same thing, euphoric hypomania. I may been sleeping less hours these days. Dont remember.
At these episoded I took caffeine daily everyday and that way the hypomanic episode lasted much longer. Seven days I think and then faded away.A couple of times I even got this hypomania WITHOUT any caffeine at all.
All of those times got in common that I pushed myself into that state by excitement, music, learned something, exciting event for example. If the excitation became big enough I switched to hypomania..Im EXTREMELY sensitive to my enviroment and also to the food I put in my mouth. A high protein low carbohydrate meal induces instant strong anxiety, tremors in me.
Even the right ratio of dietary oils induced some very clear exciting mood elevation in me.This stuff is really, really strang.
So.. Do you got similar experiences?
Do you think that caffeines effect on cortisol and dopamine causes these effects or is it a synergy with the effect of sleep deprivation and caffeine.
Does the fact that I induced hypomania without caffeine make me bipolar II?
I dont remember much of my childhood but mom says I always been sensitive.
As a child my mom had cancer and my dad is an alcoholic. My moms cancer got cured
During the teenage years I felt extremely horrible for years without doing anything to make ot better. I suffered through school with intense chronic back and stomachpain and an alcoholic father that used my as a support.I think all this stuff contribute to the hypersensitivities and strange things I've experienced.
The medication I think got a big part too.
I dont use the mega dose caffeine thing anymore and I DONT RECOMMEND anyone to do that. Its DANGEROUS!
So what do you think is the mechanism behind this? Have I developed Bipolar?
Keep fighting out there everyone. :)
Sinse then I
poster:gunhild
thread:996729
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110914/msgs/996729.html