Posted by Cydnie on November 23, 2010, at 9:56:05
In reply to Re: So scared to stop my adderall and start vivactil!, posted by Phillipa on November 22, 2010, at 21:37:10
Thank you both so much. For the first time ever I think, last night I was so scared that I wouldn't make it through. I told my husband I just wanted to end the pain, not die, but just stop hurting. I've been in chronic pain for so long, and have dealt with so so so many nasty doctors and nurses, I've become more sensitive to it instead of less, more of a doormat, and that makes that kind of person treat you even worse. I am in too much of a hole to get angry, I am too depressed and it scares me. I even told me husband yes, he could bring me to the hospital because I was saying my baby wouldn't even remember me, everyone would be fine eventually, and my husband was so scared. I then decided to just go to bed, and he called my mom who never never never comes over to see me or my baby, and I don't know what the heck he told her, but she came over last night while I was sleeping. I have to go to a doctor's appt in a few minutes, and expect I will cry alot because I can't seem to stop, and my husband is going with me (He has his awful moments, and his great! I guess like all of us, but I know I need counseling when I can't think of one great or even good thing I've done). I feel like, am I being punished, is that why life is so hard? Does anyone else ever feel like that? I think my parents would probably think so (they are very religious, my husband is jewish and told me they are like orthodox jews) and wonder maybe a lot of the guilt I am feeling is coming from that. Oh, I'm late. Sorry. Thanks for writing!!
poster:Cydnie
thread:971022
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20101117/msgs/971070.html