Posted by Sigismund on May 6, 2009, at 17:38:30
In reply to Re: rilutek / namenda harm?, posted by uncouth on May 5, 2009, at 20:23:37
Alex, I just want to say to begin that it is obvious that you are in terrible pain.
A decent health system would, IMO, put you in hospital on low dose morphine and withdraw you from every psychiatric treatment and drug and have a long think about what to do next.
So, that's my 2 bob's worth.I was very reassured to hear you say this.....
>i have come to the conclusion that i am currently in a downward spiral of obsessive-compulsive behavior such that my depression has become my primary hobby and it has crowded out everything else, and my obsessional research, psychobabble postings, med/supplament trials, etc. is completely counterproductive and dangerous and if i continue along this path i will only end up in the ground by my own hands. i am currently in a situation where i honestly don't think I would recognize or accept "wellness" if it was sent to me by express mail. i just don't think i'd recognize it, and i think me staying depressed is the easy way out for some strange reason.
I'm stunned by how difficult this must be for you, and how painful and special that insight is.
Someone put this in a post on the psych board. It touches on what you mention and I really liked it.>Finally I realized that wanting to get rid of the "bad" parts of me was itself the problem. I had to hear what they were saying and stop thinking of them as "bad." This led to a new level of self-love. Paradoxically, I think a lot of the change in therapy is realizing you don't need to--or that you're going to--change that much. And that in itself is a huge change.
poster:Sigismund
thread:894035
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090505/msgs/894518.html