Posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on April 27, 2009, at 13:12:52
In reply to Re: Med Help Request (also at neutransmitters board), posted by polarbear206 on April 24, 2009, at 23:27:02
Hello polarbear, great name! (polar=bipolarity?)
It has been suggested to me that I may have BPII but it is a very confusing landscape. It's all on a spectrum, I understand. It's difficult for me to think of a mood stabilizer since most of my moods are low, and I've only experienced low-normal or something approaching normality, with happiness and general stability. My energy level is almost always in the toilet. I rarely have energetic days. I never need little sleep; never am euphoric.
But there is that anxiety. And anger. And there are those days, mostly after I do not have a good night sleep, when I drive recklessly (sorry, all, it's a bad thing, I know).
When is it BPII and when the effects of PTSD? When is it BPII and when features of BPD, with strong feelings of emptiness? When is it BPII and when is it just loving my spouse but having a history in which he has left me hanging when I needed him the most?
I have this probably irrational, but maybe not, fear. When my sister was first dx'ed 20+ years ago, she was diagnosed as BPI. Put on Lithium all that. She appeared to do well, and then went in the tank--and was later dx'ed with schizophrenia.
I know it is irrational, but the association between medication for BP and her eventual schizophrenia looms huge in my mind.
I am not sure there is any pharmacological basis to it, but there it is. One of my fears.
Thanks for responding so thoughtfully, polarbear.
poster:Amelia_in_StPaul
thread:892612
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090426/msgs/893035.html