Posted by Enigma on April 17, 2009, at 21:01:41
In reply to Re: Remeron for treatment resistant depression..., posted by Sigismund on April 17, 2009, at 19:49:45
> >I'm on my whopping 2nd day at 7.5mg and the sedation is horrible... I mean, you lose, 3/4 of a day, including sleep time.
>
> Yes. The only thing I liked about it was that it made my sleep deeper, but that was nowhere near enough to make it worthwhile.Thank you all for the responses.
Now here is where I completely lose my mind.
Prequel:
After a large number of setbacks today, I finally found 5 mins of solace from my depression for the day. I had my pc w/winamp playing my favorite tunes, something I can't even bring myself to do because I'm usually too depressed, got my guitar amp and plugged a decent mic into it and belted out(sang) some tunes to some songs I know most of the words to (I know about downloading lyrics, karaoke, etc).. So, then I come back here.
I wanted off of Nardil because I couldn't stand the side-effects anymore. The insomnia, sleep disturbance (waking up over and over again at night), liver damage, MAOI issues, frequent urination, sweating, the list goes on. I get them all. I've been on off Nardil 4 times now all for over 3-8 months. Back to the Selegeline I guess, even though on a functionality scale from 1-10, 10 being best, it works at about a 3-4 at the highest dose for me, then quickly poops out.The doc was all for the change from Nardil.
I forget if I had written down remeron or he mentioned it.. He was all for the change. He admitted he was never comfortable with me taking Nardil in the first place (since he has no exp with Nardil).
Like I said, I'm way overweight from seroquel and the way it looks, I'm going to have to LOSE most of this summer because the weight isn't coming off, and I look like I swallowed a basketball. NOTHING I've tried has taken any of the weight off. There also NO even weight distribution. When I was 22, I was ripped. 6 pack abs, the works.. (40 now) I had abs for 15 years straight. Now I look like Homer Simpson with hair. My last doc did this to me with Zyprexa... added 40 pounds in a heart beat. Took 3x longer to take it off, even with Topamax helping. This time, Topamax aint doing squat and I HATE the way I look.. *I MEAN HATE*. I WILL NOT TAKE MY SHIRT OFF IN PUBLIC. I've been thin/toned all my life. Until the last 2 years and these damned meds.
Now he wants me to start a drug where I can finally sleep - no duh, I could sleep once I dropped the Nardil - WHICH I TOLD HIM BEFORE GETTING REMERON - and its going to add pounds again too?
Sadly, he's one of the best doctors around here. There's no one else. My previous doc who had to quit (changed careers in a sense) wouldn't have done things too much differently.
SSRI do not work for me
TRIC turn me into a raging lunatic - no lie (quite lucky no one got hurt)
A couple other AD's almost made me kill myself.
You name it, I've probably tried it. I have a 2 page long list.
ECT (twice - not 2 times, 2 ROUNDS (bilateral - 10 times each) at 2 hospitals)
VNS - can't afford - success rate WAY to low for me
IBS? - can't afford
Magnetic thing - can't afford - low success rate from what I hear.After stopping Nardil (tapering) I cried a lot, and I'm not a crier). But it stopped. Unfortunately I was still really depressed. I didn't want, and still don't want to do anything but log onto this pc (well, I don't even want to do that) and sleep. Also, got a dui a month ago. Hint: Don't drink w/even 2 beers with Geodon. It's instantly becomes around 4 beers, there are other behaviors you won't like either. Obviously, don't drink on any of these meds...
So just when I though there may be some light at the end of the tunnel, it looks now like the light it out. All I see now are a load a closed tunnels.
I'm sick of this game. Been playing for 10 years easy.
I don't want to play anymore.
poster:Enigma
thread:891271
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090416/msgs/891320.html