Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on November 30, 2008, at 12:05:29
I've felt in the past that you believed I was criticizing you when I wrote to you, or that you didn't think I had any understanding of what you were trying to express. I just want you to know one thing: I do care. I try very hard to express that, and apparently I'm not very successful.
Here are a few points that have come to my mind in reading your posts:
1. I believe that working with a good therapist would be beneficial for you. A good therapist would offer a place to express all this pain, and look at ways to process it so that you wouldn't hurt so badly all the time -- and it sounds as though you do hurt badly all the time. It doesn't sound as though you've found that "good therapist" yet. Can you tell us the theoretical orientation of this therapist? It doesn't sound as though this one is either CBT or psychodynamic, although you haven't said much about him/her. Where are you getting counseling: church, school, through your psychiatrist's office?
Remember: you can fire a therapist and find another. The purpose of therapy is to help *you,* and if this one isn't, there's another out there who will.
2. I believe that some of your behavior contributes to your unhappiness. Jogging late at night and then getting on the computer doesn't sound as though it would be conducive to a healthy sleep pattern, and sleep patterns contribute to mood disorders. It might be worth examining areas in which your behavioral choices work against you.
3. Are you still in school? I think you've said you're working now, and living with a family member? Do you find that you have adequate structure to your life? That can be very helpful in combating mood disorders.
I truly wish I could help you. I sincerely wish you the very best luck.
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Hello..... advice is good need wisdom, but if, i dont listen than...there no use. That's on my side. But always, i've gone a direction some people have, well "how to live your life", no i want to live life the way i want, "yes, have a functional life, no going to hard liqour (which actually is better than Xanax!)
You see, i cannot sometimes express the I feel...and i just stay quiet, while i'm accused of something. Now i have defend what.....i take Dexedrine, yes in the past, defiently abused it: and still really the reason was, now if anyreads this and thinks diffrent, this is really what went on. My doctor has me on 45mg Spansules (3 Capsules) ok......the last session I had with him, he told me take 1 at 9am 1 at 12 pm 1 at 3pm.
But, do you see its not helping with getting my mind envolved, because....first thing, i stay in this angry idleness because i feel i cant do anything, primarily because, my mother is/was a control freak, i mean CONTROL PATROL. Never let me have fun.....toxic sometimes being around her. You ever heard the term "i smell one big rat in this room, and it really reeks"
My doctor will not change, my dosage, he is so strict on just going up, but let me...he put me on medications that where like putting battery acid in the brain "Insane in the Brain"
oh darn....i didnt realize the time...i gotta run.
crap.......i have to church, i'm already late!!!get back with on this later, sorry i'm horrible with time.
rj
poster:rjlockhart04-08
thread:865905
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20081123/msgs/865905.html