Posted by AdamCanada on July 24, 2007, at 21:07:42
Normally I take 10mg paxil and 0.5 ativan (ativan 2-3 times a day) for my strong clinical depression and severe social anxiety. I am able to feel well livable but often very bored, very low interests, low drive, low motivation, very anti social. Social anxiety has been reduced massibly with paxil and ativan but anti-socialness has not.
So here comes ritalin I took 10mg all at once today instead of 5mg twice as i usually do when i go out... except today i did not go out i stayed at home.So I am watching tv shows like On The Lot and Big Brother 8 and I feel so f------ alive. As if I want to make my own movies and write my own scripts, and then I'm watching BB8 and I feel like I wish I was on that show with these arrogant people lol. In general I just feel alive.
Do you know what I mean? I feel like I can go out meet someone and have a lot to say. Normally I would have almost nothing to say and consider myself very boring. But with this ritalin I suddenly feel so much better. Depressive symptoms lessened and I feel a bit like when I was young and I was so full of life and interested in so many things and.... it just feels beautiful to be alive. Normally I hate writting but here I am and I feel like I can go on and on.
Suddenly I feel like I want to go out and meet girls and make friends and just hell anything. This is what it's like to feel normal. I wish I could feel like this all the time. Over a dozen maybe 2 dozen medications I have tried from usual SSRI's to wellbutrin and even anti-psychotics and... most of them do so little for me.
I wish there was something like ritalin that could work in the long term because I know this is only a short term solution. I take ritalin when needed for when i go out to meet someone and it allows me to enjoy myself and enjoy life. Without ritalin or modafinil life would be boring, incredibly boring for me.
What Anti-depressants out there can make me feel like this? Any suggestions I would GREATly appreciate. I love the heightened emotions, I love feeling passionate, I love feeling so free and open and able to share myself. I want to be like this more often but I know if I take ritalin too much it loses it's effect.
So please... share me any suggestions (i have tried modafinil and it works similarly but mostly for energy/motivation).Please share any suggestions at all. Thank you for reading.
poster:AdamCanada
thread:771746
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070719/msgs/771746.html