Posted by jealibeanz on April 6, 2007, at 4:51:22
I didn't take my Xanax XR yesterday. I didn't crave it, feel more anxious than normal, feel dizzy, nauseuous, have a headache, etc... none of those typical benzo withdrawal symptoms. I think this is the first day since I started the XR that I took absolutely nothing. There were some days when I was breaking the 3mg tablet apart and just taking small bits... not 3 mg total for the day (I know breaking XR = bad! but my point is I took less than prescribed)
This is after 11 months of almost continuous, daily Xanax dosing. I did have spuratic days several times a month when I was taking regular Xanax (max: 4mg/day), when I'd take nothing at all... purposely, because I'd try to test/discipline myself to see how long I can go, within reason.
People say that benzo withdrawal can be horrible and that Xanax is the worst to get off of. Well, I consider myself already to be off of the "worst offender", since I've switched to Xanax XR. That's probably one reason why I can just stop or not take it at a scheduled time during the day, since it doesn't have that immediate gratification feeling (although the website states they're nearly identical in onset: 1.5 hr for IR, 1.6 for XR... not in my experience). Or, it could be that XR does nothing anyhow, so I don't mind not taking it!
But anyway, I'm sort of proud in a sense. I like that my body doesn't seem to go through withdrawals. I know I haven't been off the XR for more than a day, but I have gone off IR for longer. I shouldn't play around with this too long, since there is that seizure risk... even though I tend to walk around with that "it won't happen to me" mindset, I'd feel pretty stupid if it did in public... or anywhere, plus a seizure would scare me!
I do actually think I could stop completely. My body is physically pretty strong and resilient. I stopped Effexor and Wellbutrin without a taper or ill-effects. I could probably do the same with this med.
This isn't to say I'd like to stop benzo's. No. Not so much. I still have a lot of anxiety since I was taken off Xanax IR. Personally, I'd like it back, since it helps.
I just thought I'd share this story and experience. It makes me feel strong because I don't *need* the medication or crave it, like so many people claim will happen to everyone after extended use.
I should tell my doctor about this. That I feel no difference if I don't or don't take Xanax XR. Haha, I hope he won't take that as an opportunity to stop medication altogether! I'd have to remind him that I have major GAD and have been experiencing symptoms since starting XR... doing nothing will leave me with still experiencing a lot of anxiety.
Ohhh... I'm really not a "model" patient. I tend to be non-complient and play with things. I try not to do that, and always think I'll never do it again, but I do. It's partially so I can have control, and partially just me trying to help myself.
It's good that my doctor likes me and doesn't seem bothered by the things I do, just uses them as guidance for his treatment plan. If I were my doctor, I'd drop the crazy patient! Haha... but it just shows me that I'm not really as difficult or bad a$$ as I think I am... I might not be a perfect patient, but there are much, much worse out there.
poster:jealibeanz
thread:747446
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070402/msgs/747446.html