Posted by yxibow on January 13, 2007, at 12:18:03
In reply to Re: Do people feel medications help or mask sympto » yxibow, posted by SLS on January 13, 2007, at 4:55:42
> Real quick, Jay.
>
> Did 9/11 affect you in any way?
>
> Have you tried Paxil?
>
>
> - ScottYes, a good observation of a devastating trauma to myself and our country -- it is believed that my disorder may have been triggered by the extreme anxiety that happened just after 9/11. My reaction was disproportionate to those around me. I would be constantly checking my cellphone for news, be worried at night that nuclear war was going to break out, and a myriad of things that led to a total breakdown of my grip on life.
Of course, these threats to our way of life were always present, we just lived through the Reagan me generation, and the relative calm of the Clinton era (we can ignore the politics here, at any rate for the sake of this discussion, but anyhow...),
But somehow spontaneously, and I believe it was about Nov 17, because I was driving up the local mountains for my somewhat annual viewing of the Leonids (meteor showers, only visible in the southwest usually because of weather, anyway) and I was seriously almost blinded by the light of cars coming and going and I saw a few meteors and got off the mountain as safe as possible.
I thought this was some sort of fluke or illness that would pass and I went out to a more local dark sky area, and again I was hit by car lights and I remember passing a gas station and seeing purple blotches in my vision on the way home.
(Yes, I have had several opthamologist appointments, an MRI, every test imaginable including Lyme, etc.)
I haven't tried Paxil, but I did try and respond to Luvox, mostly for the hysteria that followed the hysteria -- 16 hour a day discussions and breakdowns with my parents about my disorder and what medications might be doing to me (it doesn't really help a disorder if you are acutely vigilant about every nuance of medication that is attempting to help you -- it is sort of counterproductive.)I was up to 450 when the electric shocks while excercising got a bit too much, and backed to 400. I was on it for a while before Cymbalta came out and I was switched, primarily because I believe my doctor felt it was better for what had become a secondary (or primary, who knows) MDD.
Indeed, there came an eventual epiphany for lack of words one day when we hit 80 on Cymbalta -- didnt have that lilt after it but I knew something was better -- Cymbalta is subtle and takes a while to take its final effect. I now take 120.
I have thought and we have occasionally discussed adding something like a small dose of Lexapro to the mixture but there are now several 5HT agents on board (Seroquel and Cymbalta) that a reduction of one or the other would have to occur because I am on polypharmacy and even the presence of Robaxin, which was made before standard P450 challenging, caused a minor Serotonin Syndrome.
But, at the moment with a slow reduction plan in Valium and Seroquel that may be something to try in the future. In the meanwhile, my treatment plan of expanding my life outside the house, volunteering places several days a week and taking several extension classes in certification for a video editing program (to add to my forte which is video editing, ironic with my visual problems), is occupying time at the moment so rocking the boat with a third variable wouldn't be good right now.
But at a later point, yes, I do wonder how much an anti-OCD (Cymbalta doesn't do much for secondary garbage thoughts in my mind which isnt my primary concern at the moment though it can be annoying) agent would add to the mixture.
Curiously, before I agreed to a neuroleptic fully on board (we did try Zyprexa but the pseudoparkinsonism was much greater than Seroquel and I was more than a bit concerned even though I swear it wiped out most things -- but then at each stage of "more wellness" its hard to judge what "wiped out" really meant today), Remeron sort of acted I think like one, at its highest dose, 45 (52.5 was a bit much), with its 5HT blockade. It was rather good for things except for adding massive pounds, so it was dropped.
At any rate, even before all of this I have had issues with getting jobs and the like, frustration and slowly giving up. I sometimes wonder if I didn't panic about possible loneliness causing suicide and have myself moved home from where I graduated from college, what fork my life might have taken. I still miss it back there and I want to return. I still go most years on a roadtrip (I still loath planes, have for a long time, but these days... ugh) back to visit though they say you can't go home and my friend circle there and everywhere I've been including home has dwindled.
And that's where getting out more and possibly pushing the darkness out of my mind might happen. But as I say, we -- or I really, don't know that this could occur.
As for ever trying Paxil, I think I was switched to it when I had my worst OCD, I don't know, I forget now -- I may have used it for dysthymia in college, or Zoloft -- my mind is fuzzy there.
But one thing in common with most all of the agents on board is -- sedation. And that alone may play a role in treatment itself though it can obviously be a detriment in managing daily affairs.
Thanks for your observation-- Jay
poster:yxibow
thread:721825
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070113/msgs/721960.html