Posted by corafree on December 1, 2006, at 23:55:59
In reply to Re: Provigil 'did nothing'(?) ... Deeply Depressed » corafree, posted by Phillipa on December 1, 2006, at 17:49:07
No it probably isn't, but it's mine and I'm stickin' to it. No I know that's not funny.
There are 'no beds' in this valley. I've asked more than once. There are a lot of people much worse than I in them. Then I suppose there are some like me that managed to get in.
The only good hospital stay I have had was one where I used my medical insurance and paid $800 for the 30day stay.
Someone said they're not like this anymore re: all $ to war.
Nice comfortable get-together rooms w/ TV, newspaper, vending machines. Good meals and vites .. geared to help your medical body return to good health .. to help hold that head on so you can get 'it' better. Medical staff caring for u as well as psych staff. A neurologist to check u out. Blood tests and maybe followups. Always someone 'to talk to if you were having trouble'. Groups to just talk or groups where someone would come in and speak. I've been there and that WAS good .. that helped me. I left knowing I'd been cared for well and helped re: meds or whatever the best they could.
My last stay was so awful. Very bad non-nutritious food, no vites. (I wrote Boo*t and yogurt on my meal sheet, knowing my nutrition was bad, and everyone sayin, "How'd you get that?", and I'm thinking to myself everyone should! A very detached staff. You had to bang on the glass windows (Is anyone thinking of 'One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest'?) and make them dislike you to get attn. Usually told "just go to your room and someone will come get you when blah blah blah ... and no one would come! I mean they'd just forget u were even there. Cement floors, cold. I was told the latter (go to your room) after asking for my Valium (I'm hyperventilating badly and top of my head felt like it was going to blow up!), bein' told had to wait for doc's call becuz he forgot to write in chart. (That happened too often!) I walked down that cold cement floor hanging onto those rails on the wall and turned to go in my room, and 'saw the floor just go out from under me'; ya' know, that feelin' b4 you're going to pass out, and I screamed 'help! help! help!' as I was weak and if I didn't hold onto the rail tightly I'd pass out and hit my head on that cement floor! (Just what I didn't need!?). I'd been hyperventilating so badly, my blood pressure went down(?) (Is it called hypotension?) Well, my screams got everyone's attn and they came running. Took me back to sit in a chair where they could see me and put head down and I waited, seemed like forever, thought head was 'gonna go' at any time! Finally given Valium and 'poof..all better'! (I often wonder if I'd been left in that state for very much longer, might something irreversible have happened to my mind?) Yeah, not a good place, hospital in the county 'system' I didn't have to pay for (LIKE I EVER WOULD!). This was last March when had nervous breakdown. Didn't have much choice as was so ill. Geeez .. need to shut up.
Hey .. tomorrow I'm going 'returning' shopping! Support daughter coming over in morn' w/ 'Starbucks I hope to wake me'. Oh and go get my hair flat ironed.
Oh I forgot. Big news! Today I drove to the office and picked up samples of Provigil. Yeah. Then came home, passed out snuggled in Dad's throw, until awoke an hr ago, and wanted to talk to you.
I see P next week. I think I'll be okay 'cuz I have you guys caring 4 me and it warms my heart and that keeps me strong and wanting to perservere.
cf
poster:corafree
thread:707810
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20061129/msgs/709579.html