Posted by verne on April 19, 2006, at 20:17:15
For the first time in over ten years I'm back on a benzo - klonopin: 0.5mgs twice a day as needed.
My blood pressure was so high, my MD also increased the inderal LA from 60mgs to 120mgs per day. I hate being on such a high dose but until I lose some weight (now at 220lbs and should weigh 170lbs) my blood pressure remains a problem.
I mentioned Emsam but he had never heard of it and said he won't prescribe MAO's anyway. He further insisted I get an appointment with the visiting pdoc (sort of like a circuit judge) at the county health clinic. That may take 6 weeks.
I know that the county pdoc is dead against benzos so I'm worried how it will play out, having another doctor prescribing inderal and klonopin while under his care. Can doctors stand that sort of thing?
I'm also on a waiting list with the only other pdoc in the county. I had been blacklisted from his clinic 12 years ago when I was seeing an associate pdoc at his clinic. I used to leave long messages on the clinic's answering machine. My pdoc eventually left town and the head pdoc refused to take my case, not wanting to deal with a troublesome borderliner like me.
This morning I called the clinic's secretary and made amends, assuring her that I don't make crazy calls anymore. I really haven't done that sort of thing for over 7 years. She was very forgiving and said that although he wasn't taking new patients, she would talk to him and, at least, put me on the waiting list. I don't think he would have a problem with either benzos or emsam.
I should be happy now that I have klonopin and true relief for my anxiety, but I still can't get over the pained look in my MD's face. He seemed conflicted about prescribing klonopin and obviously disappointed that I hadn't been doing anything constructive the last 6 months. I mean, I felt like I had done *wrong* which, in turn, has made me feel guilty and even a little anxious.
I'm glad I finally convinced the MD to treat my anxiety but the guilt is overwhelming.
Verne
poster:verne
thread:634952
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060417/msgs/634952.html