Posted by capricorn on April 15, 2006, at 15:54:54
In reply to Re: Irrationality and stress, posted by bassman on April 15, 2006, at 12:53:03
> At first it sounded like what a friend of mine describes when he becomes instantly upset and angry, which has been diagnosed as the manic part of him being bipolar. But then he feels really badly about what he's said or done, so bad fit. He's also as nice and humorous a guy as you'd ever meet. I'm really interested in what other people may come up with..
Thanks for replying Bassman,
Aside of the above i have problems coping with criticism and rejection(real or otherwise) ie accute anger and over the top reactions only to feel like a total worthless sh*t when the anger etc has passed,anxiety that leaves me feeling mentally and physically wiped out that seems to come from nowhere,feel insecure/paranoid,either feel that i am emotionally dead or my emotions are too strong- that if i could touch them i'd get burnt by doing so.
I have often felt that the only time i feel alive is when i'm emotionally charged in a negative way.I can like people and then they do or say something and it feels as though they are my worst enemy and i can act hatefully towards them.
With regards to rejection my tendency is
often to reactively lash out in a mix of anger,fear, and paranoia and then when that subsides there comes the self realisation of what an awful person i am.
Inwardly i soak things up whilst outwardly being in extreme denial.I find that while a lot of things i do are ok they don't give me a great sense of fulfillment.It's like if food= inner fulfillment then i've got Prader-Willi(sp).Sometimes i will try and fill the
void by snacking and snacking in the hope that food will make it go away but it doesn't.
poster:capricorn
thread:633467
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060412/msgs/633552.html