Posted by cache-monkey on April 23, 2005, at 14:24:33
In reply to Can Hypomania be one's rest state, posted by D minor on April 22, 2005, at 23:25:51
I go through this struggle with my parents, too. Especially with my mother, who wants her "happy, stable, confident, well-adjusted son" back. It makes it really frustrating for me to deal with the roots of my mental illness, since there's this constant pressure to be well NOW.
I don't know if there is a psychodynamic base to some of what you're going through. But for me, a lot of my issues do have a root cause in some early emotional experiences (with my mother, no less!). But there's also a bit of dysthymia and soft bipolarity thrown in the mix. So, I think for me a lot can be worked out in therapy, along with decent supportive meds. But the going may be really slow.
I've been also for a time trying to tinker with my meds to get the up, happy, hypomanic edge. But through therapy, I've come to learn that patience is necessary. Focussing too much on medication can take away from other emotional and life-strategies for dealing with what you feel. This is a tough balance to strike, especially since there's a part of you that just wants to be better NOW, too.
But the harder one is are on onesself, the less stable one will feel. As a result, not having patient supportive parents makes it harder to actually get better. For me, I'm trying to learn to distance myself from the forces in my life that demand happiness NOW. This is also a hard balance to strike, since they're also potentially a source of love and support for me.
What can be particularly devastating is not having anyone to talk to who *really* understands, who can just be there for you empathically. If you're not in therapy, that might be a good place to start. (But there, again, it's a slow process, particularly as you are getting to know and trust eachother.) If you have any partiuclarly understanding friends they might also be people to turn to. And, of course, there's the supportive people here on pbabble.
It really sucks that we get stuck with this, but for most it is possible to get well ... with time. It might not be that hypomania is your rest state. It could be that there's something better (peace?) out there that you find in going through this process.
Good luck,
cache-monkey
> My parents say that in observing me they think that hypomania used to be the way I was "normally"-before I got sick. They make me feel so bad. Should I cut back on my meds to try to keep a little "hypomanic buzz." Is that even possible without crashing into depression or escallating into mania?
>
> "Thats the way you were before you got sick."
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> I don't want to be bipolar anymore. Oh God!
>
> dm
poster:cache-monkey
thread:488210
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050423/msgs/488369.html