Posted by LynneDa on February 2, 2004, at 15:15:57
In reply to low on lexapro, posted by sexylexy on February 2, 2004, at 13:51:20
Hi Lexy - I understand your concern. I'm really glad to hear you had a good weekend.
Someone once mentioned that being depressed is a learned behavior. I take that to mean that once you've been depressed for awhile, your behaviors, attitudes and outlooks become ingrained, habitual. Therefore, even though the medication removes the chemical barriers to feeling depressed, there are still the behavioral and cognitive barriers that we may have to work on.
That's one train of thought. Another is that our body's chemistry is not consistent and even. It changes daily depending on what & when we eat, how & when we sleep, the weather, what we have to accomplish, etc.
My third thought for you is that you may not feel wholly good until you're back in your home surroundings with the people who love you! And that feeling is normal and would happen to anyone, depressed or not :-).
It's been a gradual thing for me - you will feel better for a larger percentage of the day as time goes on. But, those percentage leaps may be quick for a few weeks and then slow down for a few weeks.
For my part, I have moments and hours when I am so up, energetic, talk too much, am way too friendly to people, etc. And it feels sort of chemically-induced. There are other times when I just need to be by myself to re-energize - and that is not like me, I've never felt that need before. So, even at 15 weeks, I still don't feel like I'm "cured" and happy all the time (within realistic expectations, I mean). But, I feel like my upping to 20mg worked, because the times when I don't feel really up aren't as bad as they were a couple of months ago. I feel calm and in control of my emotions the majority of the time.
I had a little blow-up with my husband over the weekend and it's so hard for me to judge whether I was being rational or not! I don't trust my judgment like I used to - is it depression or PMS or do I have a legitimate gripe here?
Hope you don't feel like I just gave a lecture!! Just know I have your same concerns, but being a couple of months further along, I think you will feel better about things as time goes on. Hang in there, girl!
~ Lynne
poster:LynneDa
thread:109458
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040131/msgs/308583.html