Posted by Vandy on January 11, 2004, at 1:18:39
In reply to Re: Loosing my mind on Lex? - HELP , posted by sexylexy on January 10, 2004, at 21:09:38
Missing your mind? It's another one of the phenomenae that go away. At least as an SE of Lex it goes away. I know many people who claim that their mind is the one thing they miss most from their youth. I suspect it's like everything else. Those wonderful things we used to have get better and better as they recede farther into the past. I know all my skills lost when my youth went away were much better in my memory than they were in my youth. But that's not my point. I want you to know something good from my experience. I thought I'd lost my mind before I started on LEX. I went through a very unexpected and unwelcome divorce. It cost me dearly in every sense of the word. One of the highest costs came from the loss of belief that I could ever share a secure love with another human being. Oh, I know death is life's only guaranteed outcome. Life is, after all, a terminal illness sexually transmitted. But one should be able to find some person with which life can be shared in those special ways that help give it meaning and comfort. Close your eyes and you can see what you truly have other than yourself in the final analysis. But the love of that special someone can sure cushion the blows of the built in solitude we all must face. And I had lost the ability to believe in finding such a person. The result was dispair. I would be in a store trying to holiday shop for my children and the gloom would settle around and try to suffocate me. It was all I could do to keep from running from the store. I could be doing anything and suddenly I might experience an anxiety that would paralyze me. Then I stopped trying to tough it out. I went to the doc and told him I needed some help. 20 mg of Lex plus some side effects plus 84 days and BINGO. The woman who loves me and shares my life doesn't fill me with the fear that she, too, might one day split. I discovered the love of friends again. My youngest son made me hear how much he loved me. My four year old grandson turned to me from a Nicolodeon program and like a bolt out of the blue said, "I wuv you gwanpa." And I could treasure it. Yes, I spent some time in some fog during my ramp up on Lex. I don't know exactly where to place the blame. I'm guessing it was the overload working its way out of my life. I don't know. But it's gone. I'm pretty sure yours will go too. Not your mind. It will probably return. And it will be better to you than it has been in years, I'll betcha!
> Needing Support~
> ya'll today is dy 18 for me and Im almost at the point where I want to give up. I know its supposed to get better but I feel like a space cadet. Please re-assure me that this works!
> Spacey Lexy
poster:Vandy
thread:109458
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040109/msgs/299269.html