Posted by fluffy on August 31, 2003, at 17:46:53
In reply to family denial » fluffy, posted by katia on August 31, 2003, at 16:14:48
How has your family coped with you "coming out of the closet" so to speak?
> KatiaWell, they haven't been completely in denial--but they never ask how I'm feeling (mentally). My mom is super pragmatic about it--she just thinks--hey--just take a pill, and it will go away (which is somewhat true, albeit much more complicated). She does not dare to address the family tree thing b/c of my dad. He's been terribly abusive to her, too. When I asked my dad about our family tree in despiration (and fear) and told him what was going on with me and my new BP diagnosis--he just started sobbing and crying. He said he feels the same way as me most of the time. I do feel for him. But for jesus sake!! He beat on my brother and I (and yelled horrible things at us) throughout my whole childhood--even into college! He would NEVER NEVER see a psychiatrist! He's probably frozen in fear due to his mom being committed (and never cured of her illness). In that sense, I can't blame him for being scared out of his wits.
Ima--if you're reading this--I hope you didn't infer that I was comparing you to my dad--I was comparing MYSELF to my dad. If I had kids, I'm seriously afraid of how I might have treated them--I have a horrible, agitated temper. I've ALWAYS been afraid of having kids b/c I've thought I might be abusive. It sounds as though you keep yourself pretty composed, even though you are hurting inside. It's really difficult to do.
Anyway--again I've become long winded. I can't help it. This is such a good group!! You guys are my support group!!!
Thank you so much everyone!!
Katy
poster:fluffy
thread:9730
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030828/msgs/255967.html