Posted by CherC68 on June 30, 2003, at 11:10:13
In reply to Re: Effexor, Prozac, Zoloft...HELP!, posted by jtc on June 29, 2003, at 23:42:06
Dear JTC,
I'm so sorry JTC that you are having it so rough. My anger is mostly directed at myself, and I blow up in front of my husband & child, but make sure they know its me and not them.
I'm going to be 40 in August, and I found that exercising is the greatest therapy for anger issues. Whether it is a speed bag, kick boxing, yoga, weight lifting, swimming, or whatever. I know as an at-home mom its very hard to find the time. Some people would think, hell she doesn't work she has plenty of time. I work only 12-14 hours a week locally. I used to work full-time downtown Chicago - 2 hours of travel a day, etc., and I found the time to exercise. Since the depression and anxiety came back full throttle this year, I stopped exercising and starting eating! I exercised more working downtown.
Find the time to exercise. Doesn't matter if its going for a walk by yourself. Do it! I have gained over 100 pounds and my self-esteem and everything has gotten worse because of the depression. When I look back on my life, knowing I've had depression problems since the age of 4, the times I've had the least depression was the years I exercised. Being busy is not exercising. Doing everyday things is not exercising. Everytime I've exercised, it has helped me better than any medicine.
The problem is, when you have depression, exercise is the last thing you want to do. Start out slow, walking, or whatever else you can think of. That is what I have started to do, and my anger is diminishing. My crying jags are slowing down too!
As far as your husband is concerned, let him know immediately when he puts you down, that you don't appreciate it. Smile when you say it. Try to make sure the kids don't see you blow up. Especially if your one child has anxiety issues. If you are going to stay in the marriage, things have to change. Instead of yelling at your husband, smile and tell him, I would appreciate if you wouldn't put me down. It sure doesn't make you any better of a person, by putting me down. Smile when you say it. Eventually, he'll get the drift. Sometimes a smile and a soft voice goes way above yelling. Look him directly in the eye. Make sure he never puts you down in front of the kids. Tell him, if he has something negative to say, be mature, and do it in private. This way I can privately tell you to go to h***. LOL. (Sorry, I have a wicked sense of humor sometimes). I was married to a verbally abusive man, and sometimes physically abusive man. My son was almost 5 when we divorced. I exercised so much and changed my physical appearance, that my husband was too afraid to say boo to me, and of course, stopped pushing, smacking and verbally abusing me. I was too afraid to divorce him, but....exercising changed my appearance, gave me confidence and I got out of that abusive situation.
But, chemical imbalances suck and they always seem to creep back up. Diet & exercise are the key for those who cannot take medicine. I really truly believe it and am trying to push myself out of this fog now by exercise.
Take Care and if you want you can write to me at CherC68@aol.com
poster:CherC68
thread:13781
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030624/msgs/238118.html