Posted by waterfall on June 12, 2003, at 20:38:36
I was diagnosed bi-polar at age 22 and spent the next two years in and out of a psych hospital, not working, gaining weight. Seven years ago I began the slow process of putting a life together. First, a steady part-time job, then full-time work, then a shared apartment, a car, and finally, four years ago, the payload: a state job with bennies Karl Marx could applaud, my own apartment, in 2001 I fell in love and we got married last August and then the whipped cream: Provigil, whose stimulant effects have given me back my energy. I now feel better than I remember feeling since before I got depressed.
How can I tell when it's a good time to try going off the medication? I've had the same doc all this time (since those first two milligrams of Ativan in the hospital, in fact) and she is very medication-oriented. I've been super-compliant and always deferred to her. Now, I want to start making treatment decisions for myself, at the least be a full partner in the whole process. She doesn't operate this way (me, doctor who makes decision, you, patient who complies. She's a good doctor but not a "partner in the healing process") and so I am looking for someone new.
BP was really over-diagnosed 9 years ago, in fact she managed to label me after a ten minute interview and I never had any manic episodes past that first one and the only truly manic symptom was spending too much. I accepted it because I was really depressed and I didn't particularly care about the label.
Now, I am feeling really good, have not been depressed without cause in a couple of years, and I feel like I owe it to myself to see if I can manage without a lifetime of medication. And here's where the label is catching up to me. Trying to find a new doc and explain my situation I get a lot of, "Well, you are BP after all..." And how exactly do you say, "Well, I don't really think so, I've just been letting it slide for 9 years because it didn't seem all that important as long as I was getting treatment for the depression?"
I would really appreciate any thoughts or suggestions -both on how to know when you're ready to try to go off the meds, and how to approach new docs.
poster:waterfall
thread:233550
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030609/msgs/233550.html