Posted by fluffy on May 18, 2003, at 13:53:28
In reply to Re: Help! I think I may be manic!, posted by Kat26 on May 18, 2003, at 6:53:25
Katia--
I know it sounds like you've gotten some good support on this thread. I just wanted to share my story with you. Your story sounds VERY similar to mine. I was extremely reluctant to believe that I was Bipolar until I looked into Bipolar II.
I was OK on SSRI's in the first year that I took them. Initially, I was prescribed Paxil for panic attacks (and then a devistating depression). I didn't know what was going on--just thought I was going insane. It wasn't until I started contemplating suicide while I was trying to do other things...constant intrusive ruminations about wanting to die. THEN I got help!!
But it wasn't until 2 years later that I had my first MARKED hypomanic episode (it was last summer). I had gone off of Paxil thinking that I had my panic attacks under control. A couple of months later, I was planning a move, rebuilding the interior of my studio space, planning huge parties (and not getting to them), feeling amorous, drinking all the time, going out and partying...Then, BOOM, I had this horrible panic attack. Then I had ruminations and started pacing, feeling insecure suddenly, no appetite, chain smoking, then not able to move or sleep at all. I remember just sitting in the same place and chain-smoking--not leaving the house unless it was to buy cigarettes. At about this time, I decided it was time to go back to the doctor.
He prescribed Lexapro, which I assumed would work like Paxil did last time. Instead, I went into a full blown mixed state--didn't sleep for 5 days, felt completely agitated, wanted to hurt myself, contemplated suicide, drove to west Texas crying the whole way there. Then I called my doc...and I got the BPII diagnosis. I had trouble accepting it, but I'm seeing those patterns now with the recurring depressions and flurries of activity before them.
I'm currently taking Lamictal, 125 mg so far and going up. I'm doing so much better!! Someone said their brother's brain is completely fucked up from SSRI's. Can that happen permanently? That scared me a bit.
Sorry for the long post. Please take care. I'm so glad you have decided to get help no matter what the DX.
Katy
poster:fluffy
thread:225051
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030514/msgs/227396.html