Posted by Katia on April 14, 2003, at 14:23:10
In reply to Re: Alcohol??, posted by fanni on April 13, 2003, at 14:25:58
It's so hard though. I mean for me all these years i've been self-medicating with alcohol and other (yet healthy) things. I've been on this "finding the right AD" ride since July 02 and have not gotten any closer. I've been on Zoloft for three months and the first five weeks I quit drinking (talking about 2-3 glasses of wine 2-3x per week). And I actually felt more depressed. (maybe b/c the zoloft was doing nothing for me except making me a zombie). I know that I have to learn to re-structure how I work in this world without the alcohol and it's a process. But in the past three weeks, I've started having a few glasses of wine again simply b/c the AD is doing nothing for me and I can now see why I've subconsciously medicated with alcohol over the years. I feel better. And that's sad, but right now it really feels like my life boat carrying me over until the right AD. The combo of inertia, apathy, but overwhelming sadness and pain is making me not be able to function at all. And I have huge bills to pay each month and am single with no help financially and live in a very expensive part of the USA. And i live in USA which basically provides no support financially/disability in this illness.
I know it's ridiculous to drink on ADs and unhealthy and it cancels it out somewhat, but what can one do anymore to function??????
any similar input would be appreciated.
thanks for letting me ramble.
Katia
poster:Katia
thread:13781
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030411/msgs/219258.html