Posted by Mock5 on January 15, 2003, at 12:41:01
In reply to Re: Here! Here!!, posted by Sadsack on January 14, 2003, at 15:48:26
> Oh my gosh-it sounds JUST like what I was doing. I thought about just swerving off an embankment,or into a tree. I started leeaving my husband with the kids more so they could bond and be better off "after I was gone". I worked on organizing everything so they wouldn't have to deal with any confusion "after I was gone.....I finally realized what I was doing and got help. It is scary but it sure is helpful to know others have been thru it!
> > Kairos, I would be happy to somehow correspond with your husband. I guess I'm just not sure what part of my story would be helpful to him. I guess I could start out by saying that in the beginning, I didn't start out wanting to kill myself, I was just miserable and would have negative thoughts. Then one day, as I was driving, a thought popped in... "I could just drive into this oncoming traffic"... and then it escalated after that... which corner would be the best in order to make it look like an accident... how I could drive off a bridge and make it look like an accident. Etc., etc. Let me know what you think would be helpful for him to read.
> >
> > I really DO care...
> >
> > EGR
>
>I haven't thought it out so much as to make plans for "when I am gone"... but I have had such high anxiety about things that I though the ONLY way to even get close to relieving the stress was to drive into a concrete barrier as I was driving down the highway. I thought I was going crazy that that was runnig through my mind. Until I read these posts, I am thinking that I am not alone! Although, I am definitely rational enough to know better than to do that... I was still upset that it was even a thought in my mind.
poster:Mock5
thread:109458
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030113/msgs/135972.html