Posted by JonW on April 30, 2002, at 21:08:52
In reply to Rambling Return, posted by Mr.Scott on April 30, 2002, at 20:12:48
Don't fall too far, Scott... we don't want to lose you. You're an incredible person. You know what, all of us "loonies" are so strong and we never get any credit for it. So I thought I'd congratulate you on being so persistent and so patient. Hang in there!
Take Care,
Jon> I was horrified and saddened to hear about sar.
>
> I have been gone from Babbledom for awhile. I Started drinking and using a lot of Cocaine. Going out a lot and trying to say "screw it to the way I feel." Still no answers on whether it's bipolar or atypical in my mind. Moments of clarity and yet deep sadness. Never a problem sleeping, except sleeping way too much. Sometimes racing thoughts, a great deal of anger and belligerance at times, goofy humor... But never any psychotic mania. Whatever it is it's chronic and relelntless and complicated by substance abuse which I thought I had wrapped up long ago (except for the drinking).
>
> I'm so sad and alone and tired and scared. My mission seems so simple yet so unobtainable. All it really is, is a disorder of moods and the sequalae of managing it poorly.
>
> You know if I didn't have to gain weight and feel all gross from Lithium or depakote I'd be more comfortable saying it was clearly mild bipolar with predominantly anxious/depressed mood.
>
> I've always been messed up. although when younger I was always hyperactive and mischievous often cruel.
>
> I don't know what the point is sometimes...of anything.
>
> Scott
poster:JonW
thread:104576
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020425/msgs/104582.html