Posted by Mark H. on February 19, 2002, at 20:14:46
In reply to Totally Down Again, posted by Mr. Scott on February 19, 2002, at 19:38:44
Scott, friend,
Don't discount your value to others. Even through your depressed mood your strength of spirit shines, offering hope for others who are depressed. I know you write with sincerity, but in this space you cannot see what is still there, vibrant and alive and aching to touch others. It is so brilliantly obvious to me, safely outside your pain.
Of impermanence I'm fond of saying, "That which frightened us in our youth returns to comfort us in old age." That is, when we're young we think impermanence means only that we'll lose something we value. With experience, we find it means also that we will be free of our suffering.
Did you know that your mind is basically weak? The good part of this is that you can trick it into believing almost anything. If you tell yourself repeatedly with intense sincerity, "I am really happy that I am suffering now," soon your mind will experience happiness. The absurdity of this trick shows us the way out of the seemingly inescapable trap of depression.
Do you know the practice of tonglen? When you hurt, you ask to take on the suffering of everyone in the world who is similarly hurt, and that by your taking it on, they may be relieved today. It costs you nothing -- you are already depressed (or have the flu, or hit your thumb with a hammer). But it gives *meaning* to your suffering where none seemed to exist before, and miraculously -- without inherently changing your suffering -- it often lightens it in a way that is impossible to describe but surprisingly easy to experience.
All great spiritual truths are mental paradoxes, beyond the reach of our limited intellects. Just let go and allow the possibility that you are wonderful and complete just the way you are, right now. Even if just for the empirical knowledge of it, choose to be happy you hurt and see what happens. Report back only if you wish to. You'll be in my heart tonight either way.
Mark H.
poster:Mark H.
thread:94706
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020215/msgs/94711.html