Posted by jay on November 28, 2001, at 5:51:49
In reply to Re: Docs get serious about weight/sex long term?DrBob?, posted by bob on November 27, 2001, at 21:00:30
Thanks Bob. I am in your boat too, and as I mentioned in another post, pre-meds, I went through a period where I dieted, lost a good chunk of weight, and just felt proud for myself. It was nothing vein, and I wasn't no 'rackbone', but felt good I could do it for me. Tehen psych meds hit...and I was fine for a fewmonths...then it piled on, and all that esteem faded away.The sex thing, it is so intertwined in relationships. It's not just 'wham bam thank you mam', but deep inimacy and connection between two lovers is part of the essence of our being. It has always been a big part of my relationships, because I had long-term, stable ones, and sex was such a beautiful act of showing someone how much you love them. As you say to, it's not just performance, it is the passionate desire..knowing that after a hard day at work, you can have visions of coming home and putting the world 'away' over wine, candles, and lovemakeing.
(Geezz..I am getting detailed here..heh..sorry...just the truth!)I hope others join our discussion...it is certainly needed!
Best wishes..
Jay> Jay:
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> I could not have said this better myself. I have had these thoughts for years. Doctors downplay the long term effects of lack of sexual ability and weight gain. The longer you deal with it, the worse of a burden it becomes. I have been on meds for 10 years, and have been overweight the whole time, until Topomax, which I had to get off of for other reasons. Not once during those 10 years was I the slightest bit amused my the weight gain. It has an undeniable psychological effect, as well as the obvious physical ones. I always hear the "it's a small price to pay" line, but it becomes bigger and bigger as time goes on. Even people I know who are well aware of the fact that I'm on medications sometimes comment about me being overweight. It's VERY annoying and frustrating. The fact that there's a billion dollar industry out there for people who want to lose weight tells you a little about what it means to people psychologically. Just look at a magazine rack. The only topic more pervasive is sex!!!
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> That brings us, of course, to your second point... being deprived of sexual desire. It's not merely the inability to get an erection once in awhile, but often a complete lack of desire, and the eventual inability to be intimate. This is very, very serious. As you have said, it is an innate part of who we are. One could even make a controversial point that we have evolved for this sole purpose - to produce the next generation. Loss of intimacy and all sexual ability is a very, very, very high price to pay, in my eyes. It's an undeniable part of being human. If you find a medecine that helps you, but adds the two aforementioned problems, they eventually loom just about as large as the original disease -- the only differences being the lack of urgency, and immediate threat to well-being and life. Thus, they are on the back burner for being eradicated.
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> It's always been very sad to me that we who suffer from mental illness have to make such compromises. The solutions to our conditions produce or aggravate two conditions that a large part of the humanity strives to address through pharmacology regardless of the presence of mental illness, i.e. Viagra, etc. It's really a terrible paradox.
>
> Bob
poster:jay
thread:85329
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20011123/msgs/85376.html