Posted by MB on August 7, 2001, at 11:58:28
Does anybody know the connection between fatigue and depression...I mean, I understand that the two are often comorbid, but is there a causative link either one way or the other? I've been off of antidepresants for about 8 months and think I could handle the awful mood and anxiety if it wasn't for the *FATIGUE*...I remember that SSRIs made the fatigue go away at first. They were stimulating to the degree that I needed to drink alcohol, smoke pot, or pop Vicodin to combat the insane rages and anxiety. After a few months, the overstimulation got better. Slowly, however, the fatigue came back with compound interest!! Anyway, no amount of coffee would wipe the fatigue out. In fact, coffee made it worse. Getting off the SSRIs gave me my energy and life back, but eight months later, here the fatigue is again. I've been to the doctor and had CBC, electrolyte, kidney, liver, B-12, TSH, and a few other tests done. They all came back normal. Could I be missing some physical problem? Is this just depression? If it's just depression, I don't know what to do given that ADs make the fatigue so much worse in the long run and stimulants make me completely crazy. 18 months ago, during the stage in the cycle when the overstimulation of the SSRI (Paxil, this time) began to wane, I got "clean and sober" (which is really an annoying misnomer because I'm allowed to drink caffeine which is a drug). Could I still be suffering some kind of post-acute withdrawal? I don't know. I feel like I'm going to keel over and die most of the time. Walking up the stairs is almost too much. I've been forcing myself to exercise to lose the 30 lbs I gained on Paxil et al., and the exercise only makes the fatigue worse (I was hoping it might make it better). I'm afraid to see a pdoc, worrying about what horrible drug I'll be put on next...The last guy I saw put me on Remeron because the Paxil was making me tired and fat!!! I just don't trust any of these guys. I'm afraid because soon I *will* have to trust one of these guys because my emotional condition is getting bad...probably because my life consists of: a) drinking one cup of coffee (one is all my tattered system can handle); b) going to gym and excercising to exaustion; c) collapsing at home for the rest of the day with anxiety and panic attacks because I'm not being a "good person," whatever the hell *that* means. I'm so fed up. Without the option of recreational drugs (read: drugs that *work*) to ease the suffering, some kind of self mutilation starts looking better and better. If another person from "The Program" tells me to "just pray" about it, I'll snap for real...I mean, you'll see me on national TV being led into a courthouse with a coat over my head :-) LOL!! OK, so I still have a sense of humor. That's a good sign, right? AHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
poster:MB
thread:73965
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010804/msgs/73965.html