Posted by Lorraine on August 6, 2001, at 18:54:02
In reply to Re: jumping in Shelli » Lorraine, posted by shelliR on August 6, 2001, at 10:58:35
Shelli: It's good to hear from you.
> > >The last few days have been really hard. I have an appointment to see my pdoc today and unless he has a better idea, I'll start parnate.
Parnate is definately providing a floor for me and some stability and I feel I can rely upon my mood. That is a very big deal for me. The downside is I am still doing some hyperventilating--though better than before. And I am having trouble sleeping at night. So I need to figure out what to do here. I also think I need to increase my Parnate a tad, but am reluctant to do so until the hyperventilating thing is under control. I get mid afternoon slumps--where I feel very sleepy.
> > > I increased the oxycontin to get through the last few days. My therapist, who is totally against opiate use (and valium for that matter), has told me that she would only work with me if I did not self-medicate and I had agreed to that. Of course my pdoc did not return my call to see if it was okay to increase it until the parnate set in, so I was left with a choice of signing myself into the hospital (again) or taking more oxy. I choose to increase the dose, so I could continue to work.
Why is she so distrusting of you? This on again off again thing would drive me nuts. And she just seems inflexible about it....
> > >but the last two times have been overstimulating for me *and* I felt trapped.
That's generally how I feel about hospitals.
> > >I remain convinced that a possible *addiction* (habituation) to codone/contin is better than the other options.
Yikes. That's a tough spot to stand in. What are your other options--MAO and sleep medication of some sort?
> Anyway, I see my pdoc at 2 est, then therapy is scheduled at 3, and I will go or not depending on what he says.Well, of course, I dieing to know what he said.
> I feel this morning that I have gotten a lot out of our work together, and that I don't lose what I've gotten if we terminate.This is a positive way of looking at it.
> > > I have been feeling this year anyway, that we are not getting much therapy work done, because it is hard to work on issues when I am this depressed.
I know, it's not very fruitful when you are sitting there saying "my meds aren't working".
> > >But I wouldn't choose to terminate at this time, so I am feeling very anxious. Also, I'm sure I can go back to her if I decide at some point that I can keep the agreement, it's just that she will have given away my times ( 2x), and one of the times is a double session.
Maybe you should move on to a therapist who doesn't put you through this stuff. I really don't like the feel of it.
>
> I am feeling fairly optimistic about parnate. As you should be. For me, the biggest issue seems to be sleep.> > > Meanwhile I am filling my work commitments which is extremely important to me. The summer is pretty loose on deadlines, but vacations will be ending at the end of August, so I need to get ready my deliverables.
It's great that you can pull yourself together to accomplish this much when your mood is not where you would like it.
>
> I am nervous how I will get everything in with my pdoc in his allowable eight minutes. :-)
> I have written everything down that we need to discuss.This too would drive me nuts. These guys are making you feel like you are lucky to get an inch of them. Plus, I'd probably go blank when I entered the door. Good luck.
>
> I'll let you know what happens either tonight or tomorrow.
>
> Are you feelings any anti-depressants effects from the parnate, or *just* no side effects?The AD effects are strong. There are side effects--mainly sleep related.
Lorraine
poster:Lorraine
thread:67742
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010804/msgs/73851.html