Posted by Cece on July 14, 2001, at 3:26:56
In reply to Re: Uh oh! , posted by frenchy on July 13, 2001, at 4:20:00
> What they are trying to treat me for is bi-polar, rapid cycling.
> It's not that i'm being pessimistic... okay, well, yea, I am, but i'm just afraid of meds really. I'm afraid of what they will do to me. You know, if they will make me tremble, or go crazy (I had a bad experience with Neurontin)....
> It's just the fear of it.
> I was recently hospitalized because I was unstable, and this is where they prescribed the meds. I'm on the Wellbutrin SR 100mg, Depakote 250 in the morning, 500 at night, and Trazadone (don't know if that is spelled right, and don't know the exact dosage at the moment).
> I'm just concerned.... and another thing about Depakote... has it been usual for it to cause ringing in the ears? I've been getting awful ringing, and it's really stressing when i'm trying to read and can't concentrate because of the ringing.
> Just wondering!
>
>I was really afraid of meds for a long time myself- many years- and did not seek medical help (tried to work it all out in therapy).
One of the most important factors for me was finding a doctor who I could talk to easily, who I trusted to be on my side, who would answer my questions, and who was smart, up-to-date, and open minded- not perfect mind you, but a pretty good fit for me. (I had to go outside my health plan to find this doctor, and had to stretch my budget and spend my savings to do it.) Only after settling in with this particular pdoc did I become willing to go through all the trials of different meds that for some of us, are necessary.
At first, side effects are really scary, but then you learn to relax a little, see what passes over time (a lot of side effects do) and to evaluate priorities, i.e. is this helping me enuf in comparison to how much this side effect is bothering me.
But I think that having a doctor to work with who you can establish a good relationship with is paramount. You need that support- but sometimes you have to try out a few, or a lot, of doctors (like trying a few or a lot of meds). You need to be able to have your questions answered to your satisfaction (like: is this ringing in my ears related to the meds, or if not what else might be causing it?). It's also perfectly valid, and accepted medical practice, to seek a second opinion when you are making important medical decisions.
It's hard enuf to do through this process when you're relatively stable, but very, very hard in a time of crisis. This board can offer you support and the bonus of other people's experiences.
But no one can predict how a given med will affect you personally- there is so much individual variation. And, anxiety and instability can cause a lot of effects of their own- including trembling, stomach problems, ringing in the ears, and going crazy.
It's been helpful for me to start meds at especially low doses- because of my fear, and because I seem to be quite sensitive to med effects (good and bad ones), and to build up slowly.
I don't mean to sound frivolous- this has helped me maintain/regain sanity- how about getting a nice massage to relax some of those poor stressed out muscles. Or find a friend to exchange neck rubs with (my neighbor and I get together to watch TV and do this).
Best wishes,
Cece
poster:Cece
thread:2774
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010708/msgs/70098.html