Posted by Alii on February 18, 2001, at 13:26:19
In reply to Re: WB, Buspar and sleep....possible? » Alii, posted by Zannah on February 15, 2001, at 1:27:02
Feeling okay this morning. Too many things to attribute it to. I am now at 150 mg Wb a.m. along with 7.5 mg temazepam upon waking or soon thereafter-meaning after I've gotten physically sick once or twice. On an up note I didn't feel as sick upon waking this morning. I went to acupuncture yesterday and as always whenever I've received acupuncture in the past I fell asleep as soon as they put the needles in and left the room. I'm lucky to live in a coastal town that has a terrific TCM college with a sliding scale clinic. Again all I had to do was ask. I'm too low to muster my pride to feel guilty about having to 'take' so much help. I truly have no other choice. I'm in bad shape and can't be alone. But I digress, back to the acupuncture. After the treatment I was ravenous and finally ate a good sized portion of food. I even ate some broccoli and rice later in the evening. Last time I started this med two years ago I lost 20-25 lbs in no time. No hunger whatsoever. With the reduced fee for treatment I can go once a week.
I need to talk to the doc to find out what level Buspar he thinks I need to level out at. I'm at 15 mg a night working at 5 mg increases every few days to 25 mg I think. I haven't had to take the temazepam 30 mg for sleep for the past few nights I think because of the Buspar taken at night. I still wake at 3:30, 4, and 5 a.m. which is not regular for me ever. Quite the drag waking so early and not having the oomph to get anything done. I feel a prisoner to my inability to do anything. I keep reminding myself that I wouldn't be this hard on someone who just had a stroke or heart attack. I just had a brain storm which knocked me for a loop. I need to simplify and go slow. Not back to square one, I learn something different each time. Yesterday the darkness didn't settle on until way late at night as compared to around 4 p.m. previously in the week. Again I know the acupuncture helped, I'm lucky my pdoc is supportive of 'alternative' therapies in conjunction with meds as needed.
Whew! That was a rant. I'm still scared. Not all the time and that is an improvement. The early waking needs to go next. I'll take on these side effects one by one and somehow drag my battered, exhausted self beyond this current hellish episode.
A good pal has arranged for two hours tubbin' and sauna at this wonderful bamboo garden place near where I live. Private and quiet with fluffy towels and delicious tea. Since all of my friends that I have reached out to have expressed not knowing how to help when I tell them that just driving me places and talking to me as I'm sobbing through the latest brain short circuitry is more than enough, but since they keep insisting I now humbly say sure you can buy me two hours of quiet time to soak in hot water--super soothing for this depressed surfer who can't get back in the ocean just yet--or pay for two weeks of acupuncture. These Silicon Valley Internet warriors feel better when they can spend to solve. Am I wrong to lean so heavily on friends? I'm scared that if I didn't swallow my pride and reach out I would have ended up in the hospital racking up debt beyond my ability to pay or more likely dead. Which is why I'm back on medicine. I don't want to end up losing to this disease. But god damn why does this fight have to be so frickin' long and hard?!
Okay, now I'm really done ranting. Thanks for the info about the nausea pill. I printed that out to take to the pdoc on Friday this week. Still moment to moment. So very weary of this fight.
--Alii
poster:Alii
thread:53802
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010212/msgs/54321.html