Posted by marine on November 30, 2000, at 2:03:27
In reply to To boB and bob and everyone else, posted by In Need on April 15, 2000, at 23:13:47
at the lowest points in my life, as i have held the razor blade to my skin, the one thing that has stopped me from going through with it is thinking of everyone who loves me, and how i would hurt them through this act. i have written multiple suicide notes over the years and that has helped me see how much pain i would cause by trying to end my own. somehow, writing to everyone i love, trying to explain and apologize, has made me see how much i would hurt them, and this has always stopped me. i think of my sister, to whom i am very close, and who means the world to me. i think of my parents, who despite everything i have done to cause them pain, love me unconditionally. i think of my cat, who will refuse to eat after a day of being away from me because she cannot bear it. i think of the people i know who have lost someone to suicide, and how much it has hurt them, how it will always cause them pain, and how they would do anything to have been able to stop that person from ending their life. these are the things that i think of when i am so close to death, and they make me feel so guilty that i can't go through with it.
poster:marine
thread:29931
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20001115/msgs/49670.html