Posted by Kath on July 5, 2000, at 20:16:10
In reply to Re: Nice weekend; yucky home-coming - help, posted by CarolAnn on July 5, 2000, at 17:25:47
Thanks CarolAnn- I welcome all input, even from people who don't have kids or whose kids are just little.
We do have a family councellor who is part of my son's day-treatment staff & we've been to a few sessions. I spoke with her today. She said that once my husband & I are over the hurt a little bit more, and if our son calls her, she's there for our family in whatever way, so I really expect that at some point we'll end up there. I think hubby & I need a little time out without ongoing daily son-stuff to deal with and I think our son needs a little time out too, to realize that maybe we really mean that we simply can't live like this anymore. Thx for your comments. They do help me keep things in perspective. Usually I get way too "empathetic" & almost feel my son's perceived feelings for him and that prevents me from doing what is probably best as a parent. When things get really bad like now, perhaps I flip way far to the other end of the emotional scale & feel "to H... with him, I've had enough". Thx for nudging me back towards the centre!!
Kath
> Kath,
> I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. I wish I could offer more in the way of support, but just don't have a basis for comparison(my daughter is only two).
> Just one thought: since you are going to speak to a family councelor, it might be an idea to make family councelling sessions part of the "deal" of moving back home. I know it is hard to look at things from his perspective, but he probably feels that it's a 'two against one' and a "you just don't understand me" type of situation. If you decide to make family counceling a part of the package, maybe you could explain it to your son as a "we want to learn how to understand you" type of thing. I know I have no right to advise on this, but I've done a lot of reading, and I do know that people are more cooperative if they truly believe that you are doing something for "their" sake rather then for "your own" sake. Good luck, and I'll be praying for you all. CarolAnn
poster:Kath
thread:39446
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000630/msgs/39501.html