Posted by Soreteh on April 6, 2000, at 19:51:31
In reply to Re: Civility/Board referees, posted by Cam W. on April 6, 2000, at 18:32:40
> > This is in response to the disagreement that came up in Tori's thread. (I'm starting a new thread because I think that one should stay focused on Tori). I for one feel very strongly that each and every one of us should "referee" this board. So many potentially useful sites have been taken over by ranting and hostility and totally ruined. That hasn't happened here, thank goodness. I think each one of us needs to protect the supportive and compassionate tone of this site by thinking about the words we use and how they might affect other people and also by gently reining in anyone who seems to be straying toward the margins of civility. For myaelf, I always try to follow the cliched old rule of good communication: say "I" rather than "you." That is, I try to speak about myself and my feelings/reactions etc., and don't accuse, label, or attribute things to others. It's not always easy, but it's good practice.
>
> ********
> Victoria - Well said! - Cam W.
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Victoria and Cam-- Thanks. I'm not an idiot and while I realize being attacked certainly reflects more on the attacker than it does on me - I'm still human and it's great to have a little support.I felt the issue did begin with Tori's issue and my response(in support of compassion and against name calling and shaming) so that's where I left it. I 'm sorry if that offended you're sensibilities. I guess when I said "referee" I just meant someone jumping in when it wasn't necessary and prolonging an issue(well-here we are in a whole new thread devoted to it). But I do try to be supportive and compassionate and appreciate the same in return. I guess I would prefer people to respect each other rather than self-appointed referees passing judgement.I think being told to get out of the thread or off the board was not supportive or kind or gentle. I think being called an idiot was inexcusable. In sum, I guess I would prefer the golden rule over a mass of vigilante referees. I respectfully request masses of support and compassion as soon as possible. Thanks for your interest and input, S.
poster:Soreteh
thread:29109
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000401/msgs/29124.html