Posted by torchgrl on January 31, 2000, at 1:19:40
In reply to Re: Update on the Depressed Person's Lair, posted by Noa on January 30, 2000, at 21:47:14
> Torch, I meant to ask, do you attribute your lethargy to the Celexa, to your depression, or what?
>
> Is your mood low, too? Or is it just numbness?Well, the odd thing (to me) about Celexa is that I noticed an effect within a couple of DAYS of starting at 10 mg (now I've been on 20 mg/day for nearly a week). I wouldn't call the feeling "contendedness"...and "apathy" has negative connotations for me, but it's somewhere in there. No mood. Not exactly happy, not unhappy, not motivated to do anything--I suppose that's why it's so difficult to make decisions (like it wasn't before!ha!); I just don't care one way or the other. Good, in that I'm not lying around stressing about all the things I'm not doing, but bad in that I'm still not doing them, either. I still retain the need to do things, but it's a tiny little, barely audible voice that says "you've just wasted another weekend of your life" etc, and still doesn't supercede the "whatever..." feeling. (I'm going to have to make myself pretend to care about the mess around here soon!) So the depression has lifted, but so has everything else! I have to remind myself to be disconcerted, but I know it's not a good thing--I'm just hoping this is temporary.
It would be more tolerable if the anhedonia were gone as well, but it's not. I went out with coworkers after work on Friday, only because I couldn't decide if I wanted to go or not and so I just went because everyone was going, and stood around for about an hour, and it was fine, but I wouldn't say I had fun or enjoyed it. It was there, I was there, and then I left. Now there's a life! I mean, I'm not crying at commercials anymore, but I think I'd be hard pressed to cry if my whole family died right now. Where to draw the line... Like I said, I'm hoping this is short-lived, because my life isn't going ANYWHERE like this, and I can't even be bothered to feel particularly upset about it...
poster:torchgrl
thread:19971
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000128/msgs/20158.html