Posted by NikkiT2 on November 28, 2004, at 6:43:10
In reply to There's no where to write about ..., posted by Shar on November 27, 2004, at 23:51:47
Hey hun,
I'm having quite a good week which is nice.. the swinging is taking some getting used though.. up and down like a yoyo!!
I miss "the old days".. I just don't find myself able to post here like I once did.. the fear of having my posts copied to admin, and pulled apart for intent is more than I can really take.. but I do read here daily and think of you all very very often.
I'm now "in my thirties" which is a very strange concept *lol* 30 just seems soooo grown up, and I sure as hell don't feel that! Though, tlaking with friends I said "I dont feel anything past 18".. but then I thought and said actually, i did.. the whole confidence thing has really been growing over past couple of years.. oh, I still query every move I make as to whether it is good enough, but I feel more able to be me, and not have to conform to everyone else as much.. at 18 I would never have had the confidence to do my own thing, I always went with the crowd and was a terrible sheep.. now I find I can be "me" alot mroe than I could before.
And I did a very grown up thing yesterday *giggles* I bought my very first pair of stillettos *l* Yup, I managed to get to 30 with never actually wearing a pair! *l* They laugh at me at work for being the shortest, but also never wearing heels.. always comfy flatties.. Our christmas party is in two weeks, so O have bought a really nice pair of siple black stillettos for that.. I didn't want to spend much money on them, so went to a cheapie store to look for them.. and got them in the sale at £5 *l* Oh, not leaher or anything, but I'm only likely to wear them twice in my life, so only wanted a throw away type pair!
I also bought two rally nice skirts, two t=shirts and a lovely top, and teh entire lot came to £32 which I thought was a real bargain!! I've discovered an enjoyment of buying clothes again.. I'm down to 40lb lost now, and am fitting back into clothes in "normal" stores now, and really enjoying it!I wish I could send some sun and light to you to chase away the blackness, I really do.. I wish I had the answers to why..
Hang in there hun.. and remember how much we lve you here
Nikki xxx
poster:NikkiT2
thread:421149
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20040626/msgs/421207.html