Posted by anna on December 21, 1999, at 1:13:39
(Warning I ramble. This is WAY LONG, so I may have broken a Babblerule....sorry. ADHD is my excuse...but then again, it's now my excuse for everything! New to board--have been reading for years, finally just decided to chime in.)
Okay--I'll lay out my "problem" (well, one of them).
I'd love as many opinions/ideas/comments as I can get--quacks/amateurs/fellow med-junkies/ real-honest docs all welcome! (My wonderful psychologist would kick me if she knew I was adding yet another distraction to my collection--one more thing for me to "research" to pieces...so nobody tell...)I think my meds maybe causing me to forget everything...but why now?
Problem:
Over the last few months, I feel I am increasingly forgetting things--primarily in the shorter term. I've always bit scatter-brained and spacey (part of my charm) but not this bad--and it's getting worse. I go to the food store and can't recall why I went. I forget meetings and things I need to do--I write them down, but if I forget to check the calendar...I don't do them. I can't recall things I did an hour earlier. If I called someone yesterday for something important--not just to chat--the next day I can't remember if I called or not. I take a pill and immediately can't recall if I have taken it....I 'm not even phased anymore when I realize (usually on Sunday) that I have left my purse in the office I use since Friday. And I drove all over, and I went to stores...don't ask.I do use all kinds of things and structures to help me stay put together, but if I get out of sync on one thing--it all falls apart and I end up one big disorganized mess very quickly.
I am 40 (oh alright, just 41) female, (like anna would be a boy) and under some major stress, though I likely appear pretty calm even to my pals . (I'm in a job hunt after a miserable work situation--I may have to change cities, I love my home and my friends and hate the idea of change...plus other stuff.) But, I did take months off to relax after I left my last job, got decent severence and, at least until the last couple of weeks, was not overly panicked about my next move.Cocktail?:
Where do I start? Oy! Have taken zoloft for 7 years for panic disorder. Also low dose Trazadone at night. Used to add xanax as needed...doc switched me to Klonopin on same basis maybe 2 yrs ago. Work stress got really bad about 18 months ago--politics and sexism and...yech! (Job itself hi pressure without the other stuff.) Depression crept in--I was taking a lot more Klonopin. Went on Buspar and Wellbruitrin also at this time. Now...flash forward to about 5 months ago. Summer. No more job. Warm. Nice tan. Go shopping. Go to lunch. Finally agree to get second opinion on meds from psychopharmacologist (jeez, are you people all a bit, ah, personality-less? Dr. Bob, not you--not from that pix! Say it isn't so! Ahh...if my doc reads this--and she would know it's moi in a second--don't take the crack personally--I have ADHD and can't help myself...remember?)Now, besides the new p-md I started seeing over the summer(and she didn't change much med-wise from the prior one--whom I like, too) I had already started seeing a psychologist earlier in the year. I wanted to understand why I am so disorganized, absent-minded and distractable. After several months of me saying no-way I got that ADHD thing, I take the written tests and combined with everything else, she confirms her hunch that I do have the ADHD...bad! (And noooow Mom tells me teachers always told her that despite my good grades, I didn't shut up and never worked up to my potential...plus other things that today would have had the school nurse shoving Ritalin down my gullet at lunchtime. )
Bear with me, we're getting there. As of about 3 weeks ago , I'm on 200mg Zoloft/day (am), 200mg Wellruitrin SR (100 am/100 pm) 50 trazadone (pm). Plus, 30-40 mg Adderal/day, split in two doses. I gave up the Buspar and the Klonipin immediately when I started the Adderall--funny how we adhd-ers calm down by taking speed! So, anyway, like I said 20 pages ago, I think the memory lapses began when I went on the Adderal, though I am not suggesting the two are related. I tell my MD-p-doc about the memory stuff.
I think she may be a bit concerned about it, and says the memory loss could be caused by the Zoloft. I express surprise, indicated by a dropped jaw--why now, after 7 years?Recap: Today: Zoloft now 100 mg/day, with 0 the ultimate goal (so far, no panic attacks). Adderal (30-40 mg/day), Welbrutrin SR (200 mg/day) trazadone 50 mg/day. After I get off zoloft completely, doc plans to start cutting back wellbrutrin, but I don't think totally. (Does that cause memory loss?)
But, though Zoloft down, still am forgetting stuff, and it seems no better.
Is it the drugs? Is it the drugs together? Is it the stress? Is it the stress and the drugs together? Is it my mother (I couldn't help it but I can't blame this one on her.) I do realize that prescribing these drugs is not an exact science, and there must be a lot that isn't known yet about these meds. I trust my doc, but wanted to let my fellow sufferers and hopefully other MDs have a shot at this, too.
Can this girl be cured?
Thank you all for your patience. I'll try never to write this much again!
PS-- I don't think this has anything to do with it, but 2 weeks ago I went on Inderal--I have had a familial (essential)tremor in my hands for ages, but getting worse last couple of years. Adderal likely doesn't help it, but I was shaking before I went on it. I now take 40 mg inderal 3x/day and no tremour.
I told the neurologist I saw for the tremour about the memory loss, he didn't seem concerned. At least I don't think he did.....I can't really remember!
poster:anna
thread:17217
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19991212/msgs/17217.html