Posted by Noa on October 19, 1999, at 1:40:44
In reply to Re: Whatever, posted by Bob on October 18, 1999, at 23:56:13
I was thinking a lot about what you wrote, that it is a big disappointment that the meds help you get through the day to day, but you still feel lousy about your self and your life. I wrote earlier about double depression--major depressive episodes (recurrent, cyclicle) on top of an ongoing depression. The meds can help control the big dips, but then you still have to deal with the long haul of feeling sub-par. Truth is, you sound more depressed than just sub-par, but I think I understand the frustration of wanting to make changes in your life and not knowing how. I used the analogy earlier of treading water. The meds keep me from drowning, but I am still just treading water to keep my head above the surface. At the moment, I am feeling more hopeful that I can move beyond the treading water stage, but I know so well the feeling of futility that maybe I will always be stuck in that place. Janey, you are still depressed. Maybe you need a med adjustment to increase the antidepressant effect. We can all suggest ways for you to try to move out of the frame you are in, ie seeing yourself as a failure, but I get the feeling you can't move out of it because you are still depressed, your medication is not fully effective. Beyond that, though, please know that it IS possible break out of the mindset of seeing everything you do as a failure and expecting only more failure. There are lots of people here with ideas of how to work on that. Are you in a place where you can recieve those kinds of suggestions? Or do you need to address the medication first?
poster:Noa
thread:13268
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19991016/msgs/13409.html