Posted by Bob on October 9, 1999, at 21:21:41
In reply to Re: Workplace discrimination, posted by Adam on October 9, 1999, at 16:47:02
> Oh - one more thing if you don't mind me asking - it sounds as though you work heaps - do you ever get the time just for yourself to just hang out or whatever, sleep-in, that sort of thing?
Deb, you are just too sweet. Thank you. As for this question -- not really. That's life in the big city. When I lived in Ann Arbor, I was getting paid $13k a year, had a car to support, and I was living fine. Now in NYC, my salary is 4 times that plus I make another, oh, $10k or so thru my teaching, I don't have a car, and I'm struggling to make ends meet. So I do work a lot. I wish I had more time to spend with my dogs out in this beautiful park we have right behind our apartment. I wish I had time to bike around Manhattan and finish my photoessay on it's bridges (well, okay, so far I've only got the Brooklyn Bridge covered...). I wish I had the time to funnel my creativity thru my personal web site. Right now, Sundays are **my** day. I used to love to sleep in, but sleeping in till 8 AM is good enough for me nowadays ... too much to do whether its work or housework or some relaxing activity. I'm actually finding that I like not sleeping in too late. (I know, I know ... feckin' icehole bastage cheerful MORNING PERSON!!!)
>I truly believe attitudes toward depression and other illnesses need to change, but I find myself asking, "is Bob getting his priorities right? Is the 'cause' more important than taking care of himself?" I hope you don't mind my candor.
Noa-I wouldn't expect anything else from a good friend, so no, I don't mind. Thank you. If you read my latest post on the Melatonin thread, then you might see that some part of me, maybe the "real me" deep inside, thinks I can fly. I've been in other "freefall" situations before -- always with respect to my job/profession. The one thing my 25 years of education have drilled into me, beyond the reach of my generalized self-doubt, is that I am among the best there is at what I do. I would have no doubt that if I left my job on Monday, I would have a new job by Tuesday ... and one that pays better. I have even had offers that I've turned down in the last two years. Most importantly for this particular episode, tho, I already have another job. It's with a research firm that lives on "soft" money (grants). Any new position needs to be funded by new grants, so I'm simply waiting for one to come thru and I am gone. This firm has an international reputation -- governments and corporations come to them, money in hand, to have work done ... so once I'm in, I'm in. With a much more collegial group of people, who came after me after doing some contract work for me and after inviting me to speak at their "shop". Oh, at the level of Senior Researcher (one step below upper management) and with a pay jump of probably $10k or so.
So, when it comes to risking my job, I literally have no fear. That, plus my sense that as a psychologist I have a responsibility to speak out and to educate, and I am a completely different person when pushed on this. My current company is a "scientific organization". That they should be so unenlightened, particularly when they have (literally) thousands of doctors and psychologists affiliated with them, is a crime. That there are others in that company in my position, given the statistics on depression, well, I cannot let what these "supervisors" are doing to me happen to them. Even if it means going to the New York Post and the other rags in town to get them to sensationalize how a scientific company like mine can have such a neanderthal approach towards people with disabilities, I will do it.
But I won't have to do that.
Now, if it were my personal life ... that's a different story. The last three women I dated (including my recent-mostly-x) have all had positions of some sort in clinical mental health. Maybe I should take a hint ....
So please, Noa, don't be concerned ... you are a special person and I am so glad I've met you thru this board ... thanks for watching my back.
> Unfortunately they usually have the upper hand and to take them on, no matter how righteous your case can be can lead to martyrdom. Here's wishing otherwise for you.
But dj, I've already admitted to having a martyr complex (but it's mostly in remission). Thank you. One of the morals (sneak peek!) is not to tip your hand, no matter how much you want to spit out the word "LAWSUIT" at them. Let them think they have the upper hand. I've got the PTB on my side. I've done all the right things, and very soon we will be breaking out the whup'ass.
(dj: PTB=Powers That Be, often closely associated with the MIB=Men In Black ;^)
> hello kitty, nobody, NOBODY has the right to call you a fucking psycho.
> If I could prove someone at the workplace did that to me, they would be
> fucking busted. At that point they crossed a serious line, and displayed
> behaviour that essentially gives you recourse. I'd check with a lawyer
> and see what your chances are.Adam, man, you got the fire, too! Thanks! But like I said in the Story To Date (STD ... naw, I think we better leave that TLA alone...), you gotta turn that anger cold. What's that Klingon proverb that Khan quotes in the movie? "Revenge is a dish best served cold." But if you're going for justice, you have to look sane and reasonable to the PTB to get them on your side. Hell, you have to **BE** sane and resonable ... or no one will take you seriously. Blow up, and you tip your hand. In trying to be reasonable with them, and in their responding in an unreasonable manner, they've hung themselves.
"Don't cry because you hunt them,
Hurt them first, they'll love you"
--Townsend yet again, Quadrophenia yet again.Time for the moral of the story (so far ... it ain't over til it's over) ....
Bob
poster:Bob
thread:12703
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19991001/msgs/12914.html