Posted by Racer on August 5, 1999, at 12:35:42
In reply to What does it feel like when the AD's work?, posted by Thumper Girl on August 5, 1999, at 4:34:08
It's waking up one morning to find that the real person inside you has finally managed to break the bonds of fear and misery that have kept her/him locked away for so long. The surprising part is that you may think you're 'yourself' while you're depressed, but the day you find your real self again, you realize how much you've missed.
For me, when I'm depressed, the stress of my life is enough to drive me over the edge. When the ADs kick in, that same stress is what makes me feel vital and alive. It makes me feel energetic, with the strength to take on anything in the world. When I'm depressed, I can't get to that strength, it may be there, but it's inaccessible to me. And when I'm depressed, I want quiet, no stress, because I just can't handle anything more than maybe getting out of bed. The ADs allow me to get up in the morning and say, "OK, which superheroine will I be today?" The ADs, when they work right, allow me to put the world into a more proper perspective. It's not the end of the world if a student doesn't think I'm great. It's not the end of the world if the house is a mess today, I can clean it tomorrow if I have time, or the next day. That's one of the perks of living alone. It isn't a sign that I'm the devil's spawn, it's more of a sign that I'm working long hours with little leisure time. And I'm not making much money for all my long hours. Oh, well, I'm working towards making this a money making enterprise that will provide me with a living salary. Long term good, right? I can see the long term again.
Both Prozac and Zoloft are SSRIs, maybe a drug in a different class would be good for you? Celexa, Effexor, Wellbutrin, Serzone are all different. There are drugs that help with the anorgasmia, Buspar, cyproheptadine, etc. Talk to your doctor, and experiment until you find one that works for you. Then get into therapy. The combination of the two is most healing.
Good luck to you.
poster:Racer
thread:9619
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990726/msgs/9634.html