Posted by Judy on July 10, 1999, at 11:50:59
In reply to ajar, posted by Racer on July 10, 1999, at 11:24:40
> The best part of this is that I didn't realize quite how profoundly trapped I felt. Now that the door has been unlocked and left a bit ajar, I realize that I can see a means of escape that doesn't involve losing the joys I know I can find in life. Acepromazine can be a wonderful thing, it can allow me safely to medicate my horse when she injures herself. It can allow me to handwalk injured racehorses who are popping their buttons. But it really isn't the answer to my problems when applied internally. It was never that I wanted to die, I just desperately needed relief from the pain I have been feeling, and, even more desperately, needed to be able to see some reason to go on another day. Those things were missing. Now, even if I haven't figured out why I should go on living in general, at least I have something to look forward to: finding out if the current cocktail will bring EUTHYMIA. (That and sewing a lime green dress. I'm in love with the fabric, and while it may be nuts or pathological, there's no better feeling than seeing a newly sewn seam as you press it flat... Uh-oh. I'm waxing eloquent about seams. Is that a bad sign?)
----------------------
That your mind is free to even think about pressing seams is the best sign of all !!!
poster:Judy
thread:8493
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990628/msgs/8523.html