Posted by Sean on March 4, 1999, at 17:56:18
In reply to Re: Skeptic , posted by pej on March 4, 1999, at 16:35:27
David-
These are deep thoughts that start getting into
an enormously complex and fascinating subject. I
think many people here have felt like you do and
certainly struggled with the whole question of
"molecular free-will". I guess at the very core
of your comments is the glaring question "what is
depression?"It is clear that serotonin, dopamine, norepinephrine,
and the like play some role in mood regulation.
But it is also clear that simple biological models
do not do justice to the complexty of the brain
and certainly don't get anywhere near the
epiphenomenon of consciousness and what it "feels"
like to percieve your own mood states and even
develop thoughts, or secondary reactive feelings
to this very private experience.I can only say that *you* know what it feels like
for you to be depressed. With some work with
therapy and meds, you may find that there are
different aspects of depression that are not
completely treated by one approach alone. For me,
recovery and growth are essentially a life-long
journey. However this disease came about, there are only
two choices: end my life or fight back.Maybe another way of thinking about it is the
reverse question "What is feeling ok?" Here too
there are many, many types of answers to this and
everybody has a different take. While physicians
and philosophers can argue about what aspect of
depression a drug is actually treating, the most
important thing is that you at least have some
options today that many people through history
did not have. If the med you are taking now
doesn't seem to help, there are lots out there
to try.On the bright side, much progress
is being made in brain research and there is
every reason to think that treatments will get
better- much better, in the future. Don't
give up hope; there is much to learn and even
though it is painful, you most definitely are
not alone.Depression sucks, it really, really, flippin
bites. Fight back, endure, at least try
to carve out a life of meaning and value. You
deserve it.
> >>Also David, If you've read some of my recent posts you will see that I have been on the med merry go round lately. But I know that this is sometimes part of it. There are so many new drugs out there and I know I will find the best fit. When you find the right drug, or combo, it is almost miraculous how much better you feel.
> I mentioned to my psychopharmacologist at my last appt," here I go on the MGRound again". In that good old understated Texas vernacular he replied,"We'll 'git it'Phil. I left with a smile on my face! Phil
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Hello everybody,
> >
> > I have been mildly depressed for a long long time,
> > without actually knowing it. But it seems to me
> > that it has been forever.
> >
> > But last year I had two bouts of severe depression in
> > late spring and then again in winter. I could not make
> > myself go and seek professional advice, hesitating all
> > the time, "lingering on the edge," looking for excuses
> > all the time (look there, it's not so bad, pull yourself
> > together, there're lots and lots of other people that
> > suffer much more... and stuff like that).
> >
> > Finally I managed somehow to walk into a psychologist's
> > room, it was about the time, when my suffering lasted
> > for about 2 months and I could no longer pretend that
> > everything's fine with me (you know, all your friends
> > asking "how are you?" and you saying with a warm
> > smile "fine, thank you" but deep inside longing to
> > scream to the world "miserable!!!").
> >
> > The psycholigist sent me to a psychiatrist to have some
> > medication prescribed since I was to leave my home
> > country to study in the Netherlands temporarily.
> > I received a diagnosis of major depressive disorder,
> > anxiety, depersonalization, derealization, and a few
> > other things that I could not understand.
> >
> > The psychiatrist gave me Zoloft 50mg, twice a day and
> > Lexaurin 1.5mg (Bromazepamum), a total dose of 3mg a
> > day. At the same time he said that my depression
> > has its roots in the structure of my personality, my
> > character. And he added that a psychotherapy for me
> > would be difficult and complicated.
> >
> > I had been skeptical about medicines for depression as
> > well as any kind of conventional psychotherapy before,
> > although never actually tried them (I had always
> > really doubted that they could be of any help to me...
> > maybe I had some kind of prejudice...? I don't know.)
> > and now the psychiatrist, although being honest,
> > even enhanced these worries in me!
> >
> > I have been on Zoloft and Lexaurin for 2 months now,
> > I can see a slight improvement (I have enough energy
> > to pretend again that everything's all right...) but
> > very often I slip into despair as to whether there
> > really is any kind of help for me? Any positive vision
> > of the future, I mean bright future? I don't know...
> >
> > I have a very intense feeling that these antidepressant
> > drugs just suppress the underlying causes of the
> > state of my mental health without really "removing"
> > them. Maybe the most severe symptoms disappear so I
> > can get through a day somehow...
> >
> > But I am sure I do not want to switch to any other
> > kind of pills and then to some other pills and on
> > and on... and although in psychotherapy it might
> > be nice to have an opportunity to talk to somebody
> > (especially when my social life is and has for a long
> > time been virtually non-existent), I don't believe
> > I can make any progress.
> >
> > What do you think?
> >
> > Thank you that you have endured to read up to this
> > point.
> >
> > Good luck to everyone,
> >
> > David
poster:Sean
thread:3400
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990301/msgs/3407.html