Psycho-Babble Faith Thread 574193

Shown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?!

Posted by allisonross on November 1, 2005, at 15:22:12

Hi, all; new here. I posted a message called: SPIRITUAL ABUSE/Bet you Never Heard A Story like this one. No one has written back, yet. and I invite you to read it, and respond, if you would, please..

I would love some feedback. it's been 3 years since my church (of 31 years) voted me out of membership (because I got a divorce after 31 years of abuse). I'm too tired to repeat this again, and hope you will be kind enough to read it.

It's only been 5 months since I have been alone (after being with the ex for 36 years; married for 31). The only thing I ever feared, was being alone/abandoned, and here it is!

I am, however, due to my faith (haven't been to a church in 3 years; may never go again, but it's okay, have my faith; it never waivered; I knew it was PEOPLE who were blind, and not God doing this to me.),

Wicked wit and sense of humor, I have gotten thru everything life has thrown at me.

Love and blessings to all, Ally (overcomer and wounded-healer) e:mail me, if you like wacalice@aol.com

www.churchabusepoetrytherapy.com (over 150 faith-based poems of anguish, healing, hope and comfort came pouring from my wounded soul)

I have also been published with the psychiatrists (!) on www.psychiatricjournal.com

Entitled: The Transcendent Child (that's me) on Overcoming Verbal and Spiritual Abuse

(My story of overcoming a lifetime of abuse)
I also counsel abused women. Verbal abuse is rampant in our society, and goes mostly unnoticed.

 

Re: 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?! allisonross

Posted by rayww on November 2, 2005, at 14:20:11

In reply to 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?!, posted by allisonross on November 1, 2005, at 15:22:12

Welcome. That was quite an introduction. Wow. I went to your website, and skimmed through most of it. Boy, talk about priestcraft! I can't believe how they treated you. I liked your poetry, though it is painful, but you are really able to bring out those feelings in others, in a way that is bearable.

 

Re: 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?! rayww

Posted by allisonross on November 2, 2005, at 15:11:00

In reply to Re: 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?! allisonross, posted by rayww on November 2, 2005, at 14:20:11

> Welcome.

Thankyou, Ray

That was quite an introduction. Wow. I went to your website, and skimmed through most of it. Boy, talk about priestcraft! I can't believe how they treated you.

Me, either!

I liked your poetry, though it is painful, but you are really able to bring out those feelings in others, in a way that is bearable.

Glad you liked it. My site has been up for 2 years, but I am still writing; now the poems are triumphant! Perhaps, i will eventually put them on there too.

I've written my memoir; Ghost Child to Triumph (have a publisher interested!), and plan to have the poems at the end of the book.

Thank you so kindly for writing. it warms my heart.

Smiles, Ally

 

Re: 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?!

Posted by lynn971 on November 6, 2005, at 23:09:40

In reply to 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?!, posted by allisonross on November 1, 2005, at 15:22:12

I am so glad that you are not a part of that church anymore.

It sounds like the pastor is more concerned about legalistic issues than about your well being

A pastor is suppose to be a sheppard to his flock. He is suppose to actually care about the individuals in the congregation. My pastor would have been more concerned about the abuse that you have been through.


I am concerned about your abusive ex living in the same house as you because he is abusive. Get him out!!!! YOu do not owe him anything. You are not responsible for his happiness.


My advice to you is to just love Jesus. Dont worry about what the other people feel is right or wrong. (I need to take my own advice)

 

Re: 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?! lynn971

Posted by allisonross on November 7, 2005, at 5:44:03

In reply to Re: 41 years of Abuse, loss, grief, /PLEASE Read?!, posted by lynn971 on November 6, 2005, at 23:09:40

> Hi, Lynn! I am so glad that you are not a part of that church anymore.
>
> It sounds like the pastor is more concerned about legalistic issues than about your well being
>
> A pastor is suppose to be a sheppard to his flock. He is suppose to actually care about the individuals in the congregation. My pastor would have been more concerned about the abuse that you have been through.

He pretended he was. I went to him 10 years previously, and he did NOTHING. When I asked him why, he said (moron) "when I saw you and your husband together in church, I assumed everything was okay." How bizarre.

>
>
> I am concerned about your abusive ex living in the same house as you because he is abusive. Get him out!!!! YOu do not owe him anything. You are not responsible for his happiness.
>
He's been gone now for 5 months. I HATE being alone, but am coping well. Good thing I am so resilient.

>
> My advice to you is to just love Jesus.

I do.

Dont worry about what the other people feel is right or wrong.

I've always been my own woman, and didn't care what others thought. I believe(d) in standing up for my principles, that's why I fought the system.

I waited 2 years and wrote to everyone in that church (10 page letter)...about "restorative justice"--This is what you did...this is how it made me feel. I then wrote a letter to the pastor (of disaster, LOL), requesting the money I had to spend in therapy (my therapist was an expert in spiritual abuse and showed up at the precise moment I needed him---no accident there. A year later, the church's insurance company sent me a token $650.00. Pathetic, but still---restorative justice.

(I need to take my own advice)

Hugs n Love to you, Lynn!

Ally


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