Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 753498

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What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 0:11:24

Hi,

We often talk about having high anxiety but seldom write about our actual experience of it. I think it would be interesting to know how much our experiences are parallel, or vary--sort of a phenomenological survery, if you will.

So, to get it going, and being brief:

I awake almost every morning with some level of anxiety--unfocused fear. The other day I heard my neighbors making noise (a trigger for me) while I was asleep, and a sharp, seering bar of fright shot through my body, which grew tight. I didn't want to get out of bed, but didn't feel safe in it. My fear level was much higher and I became two people in dealing with others: the apparently functional person and the one behind battling terror, sometimes feeling hopeless, sometimes feeling that the psychic pain was intolerable.

While life has its stressors, it's clear to me that my anxiety comes first, so while on one day being afraid I might have made a mistake would trouble me a little, if the fires of anxiety are already kindled I can be terrified that I've done something terribly wrong. People don't understand the agony that anxiety can cause, which can exhaust my physical resources more than exercise.

So much for being brief.

What's your experience?

Johann

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by UgottaHaveHope on April 26, 2007, at 3:00:10

In reply to What does your anxiety look like?, posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 0:11:24

The best explanation to a pdoc is just "free-floating fear"

The best explanation to my friends is that it feels like "walking through a haunted house, knowing you are going to get scared but not know when or where." You know, the high level of nervous anticipation.

Good post, I look forward to reading what others say.

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like? UgottaHaveHope

Posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 12:37:01

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by UgottaHaveHope on April 26, 2007, at 3:00:10

The metaphor of the haunted house captures it well for me.

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by Phillipa on April 26, 2007, at 12:38:36

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by UgottaHaveHope on April 26, 2007, at 3:00:10

Worry and fear and trying so hard to go and do things. I fear silly things like going upstairs now how ridiculous is that? And my pdoc said no wonder you are always so tired your anxiety wears you out. I do get some relief from my bike riding but at the end of the day when I know I can then relax or at least try do. Do you take a med during the day for it? I don't. Love Phillipa

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 14:45:28

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by Phillipa on April 26, 2007, at 12:38:36

Yes, anxiety is exhausting, although I find that if I *can* exercise I do feel better, likely due to endorphins and self-esteem.

I have just moved to taking Klonopin throughout the day (.5 before bed, then .25 morning and evening--basically every 8 hours). It seems to be helping, and I may increase this.

I have taken and am taking other meds, but nothing has conquered the anxiety (though the depression is gone due to lithium). I am avoiding Nardil. I've got to be sharp mentally and emotionally for my job, and I can't tolerate gaining any more weight (lithium).

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by Guy on April 26, 2007, at 16:44:28

In reply to What does your anxiety look like?, posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 0:11:24

I have a phobia of insomnia and am stricken by fear almost every morning. Once my nervous system is activated, nothing seems to help. The physical symptoms include shortness of breath, a feeling that my heart is skipping beats, headache, backache (spinal column) and a horrible pulsing in my throat and head. Any normal person would freak out if he experienced this for just one day. I've endured it almost continuously for eleven years and my spirit is broken. Every day I look through the door to the darkness beyond...wondering when I will get the courage to act.

 

That sounds like panic attacks, not anxiety Guy

Posted by UgottaHaveHope on April 26, 2007, at 18:44:59

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by Guy on April 26, 2007, at 16:44:28

Have you been diagnosed? If so, with what? That sounds like panic attacks, which can be treated with different therapy and drugs than anxiety (although some are the same).

I hate that you go through that every day. You are a VERY STRONG person to make it 11 years and running. You are stronger than you think you are.

Michael

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 18:48:11

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by Guy on April 26, 2007, at 16:44:28

Guy,

I'm so sorry to hear how agonizing your daily experience is. I agree, most people have no idea what you endure and many would not be able to tolerate it. It's amazing what we can live with, although I know it doesn't feel like living. I, too, have wondered when I will walk through that door, and one time I hospitalized myself. I wish you enough breaks in the pain so you can keep hope alive. Thanks for sharing your story. Johann

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by devunea on April 26, 2007, at 20:42:51

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 18:48:11

i'm not a doc but i think that your experience as described should be an more of an isolated incidence. i have felt that bad, i'm was so stupid i actually thought i would die the first time, but it doesn't happen often, thankfully. but if i were you i would want to feel better, you deserve it and i hope you do.

 

Re: What does your anxiety look like?

Posted by Johann on April 26, 2007, at 20:50:48

In reply to Re: What does your anxiety look like?, posted by devunea on April 26, 2007, at 20:42:51

I'm not sure if you're responding to my description of my anxiety or one of the other ones, but if it's mine, it would be nice if it were an isolated incident. I and my doctors have been approaching it from many directions. I've been more hopeful lately, but it comes and goes. And of course I hope some well-being decides to linger. Thanks for your kind thoughts.--Johann


> i'm not a doc but i think that your experience as described should be an more of an isolated incidence. i have felt that bad, i'm was so stupid i actually thought i would die the first time, but it doesn't happen often, thankfully. but if i were you i would want to feel better, you deserve it and i hope you do.


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