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Re: suicidality exhaustion... TRIGGER » SLS

Posted by Maxime on September 18, 2010, at 10:08:10

In reply to Re: suicidality exhaustion... TRIGGER » Maxime, posted by SLS on September 18, 2010, at 6:59:38

> Maxime, I was thinking...
> Is it possible that you are cognitively obsessed with the idea of suicide (either OCD or OCPD) rather than just feeling suicidal? Wouldn't there be an obsessive counterpart to your psyche, given your other conditions? Perhaps there is a cognitive aspect to your thoughts of suicide that is independent of depression.
> - Scott

Oh yes, for sure. I told my psychiatrist that I think that my suicidal thinking is OCD. He looked at me blankly and said "no". Even though he said "no" I still believe that there is an OCD component. Although my suicidal ideas get much, much worse when I am depressed, or feelings hopelessness. I feel hopeless a lot of the time. Me against the world and the world is winning. Maybe I wouldn`t feel this way if I were more social and around people (just a small group) and not so alone. But I am not very fun to be around when I feel this way (hopeless, depressed). I have few friends and the ones I have are scattered around Canada, mainly in Alberta.

How would I get rid of the OCD component? Would that be through therapy?

Bipolar Type 2, ED-NOS, Self-hatred
Being happy doesn´t mean the pain is gone. you just bury it deeper.




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