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Re: Time for an MAOI - Sorry - Above For SLS

Posted by Phillipa on September 24, 2006, at 12:26:22

In reply to Re: Time for an MAOI - Sorry - Above For Phillipa, posted by SLS on September 24, 2006, at 11:29:24

Scott I'm not scared to post them here. As you guys are the only people I feel that care at all. l0years prior I was living in VA Beach working as an RN. I met my current husband, sold my house, my boat, left my pool behind and a job I loved and moved to NC. At the time I was taking.125mg of xanax and not really drinking. But okay he was alchoholic and I started with the 5-6 beers a night and the xanan.5 at night. It was a very stressful year as he'd had no relationships longterm before. So I also recongnized that him being l3years younger meant I would age ahead of him. And I discussed it with him. He said it didn't matter. But One year later my thyroid went and that was the beginning of the decline. See my Mother had been sick since I was 2years old and blamed me for this. I raised myself. I buried the blame and moved onward thinking I was doing great. Now I'm 60 and that's old. I never thought I would be old and my body is letting me down . First the thyroid that seemed to trigger the depression or worse anxiety then the latest crisis the diverticulistis and elevated liver enzymes I'm terrified of dying. And you say go to psychology but I don't want to have an affair with my therapist and I'm not 20 some odd years old. Doesn't anyone here but me realize that by the time there are better drugs available I'll be dead and buried and I'm terrified of death.. My worst fear is dying. Love Jan ps you all know my real name anyway.Oh I said my body would never fail me. And when I paid my bills from my medicaire I was proud as writing out bills scares me too. I said to Greg phewww that's done. We got home he said oh by the way you owe me $269 for the pups ER visit. My heart plummmeted as I thought I'd have enough left to buy hairspray. I'd been waiting for my check.

 

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poster:Phillipa thread:688552
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