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Re:controlled hypomania Metalblade

Posted by ramsea on January 19, 2004, at 5:47:38

In reply to Re: Thoughts on Social Phobia, and possible remedies, posted by Metalblade on January 14, 2004, at 17:44:24

Very interesting. As a bipolar with social phobia problems, I have to agree. When I am hypomanic I am a people-magnet. I get offered jobs and projects, friendships come to me, social networks appear with me in them----and then, very scarily, the hypomania shuts up like a telescope and I am very alone, burdened with the links I've made and the responsibilities and promises to do things with others that I simply cannot live up to anymore. It makes me feel an abject failure. If I never experienced hypomania I would just be a more stable and content recluse, rather than a person who has made a grand splash and who now has to leave this and that project/group, quit jobs, drop friends or be dropped (for lack of being available and coming through with the same fun personality). What a thing to have to endure!!!!! Ever notice if you don't start something there is no failure in that, but if you start aPH.D say, and do really well at first, and then have to drop it due to depression/social anxietym forever after that you will be described by that failure? People will ask what you did during such and such time--Worked on Ph.D. Or folks who know you will know you did this. And ever after it's, "Oh, how sad you weren't able to finish it." So you become pathetic just because your rotten hypomania didn't last out long enough to finish a ptoject. If you figure a way to keep it going, please lemme know.


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