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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 18:08:36
In reply to Re: My dear Ms IsoM » OddipusRex, posted by mikhail99 on January 31, 2003, at 17:44:42
"Please don't..... post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down, pressure others, use language that could offend others, exaggerate or overgeneralize -- et cetera. "
Wouldn't this cover it? It's in the civility guidelines :-)
>
> Ok, I guess we all need to think twice about trying to post anything funny on the social board. GEEZ! Maybe Dr. Bob should have some humor guidelines???
>
> Mik
Posted by jay on January 31, 2003, at 18:59:44
In reply to My dear Ms IsoM » IsoM, posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 17:24:05
Oh, c'mon....people joke about us 'Canucks' and you don't see us getting all uptight.(And about 'Newfies'..etc...) I stand by IsoM's choice to post this 110 percent, because it's funny as hell, and is in no way harmful. It seems like it's 'evil' and 'anti-PC' if *anybody* makes some kind of joke about Americans these days. Man..Jay
Posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 19:03:39
In reply to My dear Ms IsoM » IsoM, posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 17:24:05
I take it that you're actually serious about your post. May I suggest finding something more pressing & serious that needs guidance or correction?
The humourous piece was simply meant to be funny. How could it possibly describe anyone or anybody that really exists? It's a verbal caricature of what "hillbillies" were thought to be like. It's as far-fetched an idea of what real people act like as the "Wily Coyote & Road Runner" cartoons are like. Should animal activists get upset over such a mindless portrayal of coyotes as being biased & bigotted? Do you know anyone that would fit the description? I doubt it. I doubt anyone knows someone that clueless.
I have a very good friend who's Ukrainian. She's an avid collector of Ukranian jokes. Why? Because she considers them funny & so far-fetched that she (& all of her Ukrainian family) isn't even remotely insulted. I belong to a minority of sorts. When jokes are light heartedly made about this group, I never feel insulted or hurt. I can very easily tell the difference between a bit of teasing & a comment with real malice. I know teasing is often a sign of someone liking you & feeling comfortable around you.
Do you see real malice in the piece of humour I posted? If you do, I'd suggest developing a softer view of many people's comments. Admittedly, there's a lot of cruelty & malice in this world, but I have difficulty in seeing any in my post. It's far too silly to be real.
And as an extra, I heartily dislike the term "Ms". I'm not a Mrs, Miss, or Ms IsoM. I'm plain IsoM. But I'm not insulted or slighted. I'm simply pointing out to you that it's ridiculous to take a high stance about every small slight we 'may' perceive.
Posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 19:28:59
In reply to and my dear OddipusRex, in return » OddipusRex, posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 19:03:39
> I take it that you're actually serious about your post. May I suggest finding something more pressing & serious that needs guidance or correction?
No please don't suggest that. It would make me feel put down. Please don't make judgments about whether my concerns are pressing or serious.
>
> The humourous piece was simply meant to be funny. How could it possibly describe anyone or anybody that really exists? It's a verbal caricature of what "hillbillies" were thought to be like.What's funny about making fun of people? Suggesting they're stupid, dirty, greedy?Why do you need to caricature people at all? Why do you need to label these people "rednecks" to make your joke humorous to you?
It's as far-fetched an idea of what real people act like as the "Wily Coyote & Road Runner" cartoons are like. Should animal activists get upset over such a mindless portrayal of coyotes as being biased & bigotted?
Are you comparing people to animals? Are you saying people and coyotes should have the same rights?
Do you know anyone that would fit the description? I doubt it. I doubt anyone knows someone that clueless.
But that's just it stereotypes don't describe real people.
>
> I have a very good friend who's Ukrainian. She's an avid collector of Ukranian jokes. Why? Because she considers them funny & so far-fetched that she (& all of her Ukrainian family) isn't even remotely insulted. I belong to a minority of sorts. When jokes are light heartedly made about this group, I never feel insulted or hurt. I can very easily tell the difference between a bit of teasing & a comment with real malice. I know teasing is often a sign of someone liking you & feeling comfortable around you.I don't see how that's relevant here. Is there some reason you choose to ridicule a group you don't belong to?
>
eople is > Do you see real malice in the piece of humour I posted? If you do, I'd suggest developing a softer view of many people's comments. Admittedly, there's a lot of cruelty & malice in this world, but I have difficulty in seeing any in my post. It's far too silly to be real.I think malice may not have been intended but that doesn't mean I don't think the words were hurtful. I don't think you are malicious but I don't intend to "soften" my views. Being told to lighten up is a way to try and silence people who have valid concerns. Being accused of being humorless is unpleasant and not true about me but I'll stick to my principles thank you very much.
>
> And as an extra, I heartily dislike the term "Ms". I'm not a Mrs, Miss, or Ms IsoM. I'm plain IsoM. But I'm not insulted or slighted. I'm simply pointing out to you that it's ridiculous to take a high stance about every small slight we 'may' perceive.I'm sorry I called you Ms. I won't do it again. I don't think my concerns are ridiculous. It hurts to be told you think they are.
Posted by justyourlaugh on January 31, 2003, at 19:30:42
In reply to Re: My dear Ms IsoM » mikhail99, posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 18:08:36
wow,
can i post about the weather?i just ordered a pizza with african american olives on it-want a slice?
j
Posted by NikkiT2 on January 31, 2003, at 19:32:39
In reply to and my dear OddipusRex, in return » OddipusRex, posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 19:03:39
Hear hear :o)
As for the Ms etc.. I agree SO much... I detest being called Ms.. and only like Mrs cos the novelty is still there...
I once had a tutor.. he banned me from his class till i would answer to Ms Surname.. I was the only female in the class and he didn;t make the males answer to Mr.. But I did tell him I would answer to Miss Surname.. he said he used Ms as he didn;t know if I was married or not.. I pointed out that I had told him (and I was 16!!) I was not married and was a Miss.. but he wouldn;t accept it!! Strangely, before I returned to his class he ended up in our local mental hospital!!
I still tell people my name is Nikki.. and please call me that... thats who I am.. and who I always will beNikki
Posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 19:39:14
In reply to Re: and my dear OddipusRex, in return » IsoM, posted by NikkiT2 on January 31, 2003, at 19:32:39
Posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 20:15:28
In reply to Re: and my dear OddipusRex, in return » IsoM, posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 19:28:59
If you couldn't see why I included my Ukrainaian friend, I'll explain it to you.
She doesn't think Ukrainian jokes steortype Ukranian people or put them down in any way. And coming from someone who's proud of her Ukrainian heritage, I think her opinion of racial or stereotypical jokes count for something. She aptly pointed out the difference between a "light hearted" joke & a derogatory one. She could see the difference. I can see the difference. Others can see the difference. You can't. It's like explaining colour to a colour-blind person.
- - - -"> I take it that you're actually serious about your post. May I suggest finding something more pressing & serious that needs guidance or correction?
No please don't suggest that. It would make me feel put down. Please don't make judgments about whether my concerns are pressing or serious."
I'm really astounded now. Would you really feel put down by my suggestion? If someone said it to me (& they have), I wouldn't feel put down. I'm not so sensitive that every passing comments going to make me feel belittled. I feel much more happy with myself than that. And I don't ind sensible suggestions from others. It's those sort of suggestions that have helped me to grow & mature over the years.
- - - - - -You're completely missing the point about the humour. It's not making fun about PEOPLE - it's making fun about the ideas of what may be polite. The ideas of etiquette can be quite amusing. I simply used the term Redneck Etiquette as that's how it was emailed me by a friend. I never in a thousand years thought anyone would get righteous over that term. How about if I call it Backwoods Etiquette? But wait - I live in near a heavily wooded area. That's not meant to be trite. I'm trying to get the point across that the humour is about *etiquette*, not *people*!
- - - - -And guess what? I do get upset when certain animals are unfairly maligned. I hate the wolf, the hynaena, the wolverine, spiders, & many bugs been shown as repulsive. I happen to like them. But I'm not chastising others about their idea of them. Yes, animals count. Not on the same level as people, but respect for all life is important & would go a long way to preserving our earth. But animals vs people is besides the point. And I'm sorry you didn't understand what I meant by it.
- - - - -I don't mind you sticking to your principles. But I will stick to mine too & I stand by my comment that I see no harm in it. You do. End of discussion.
And as Kipling said "Oh, East is East and West is West, and never the twain shall meet,
Till Earth and Sky stand presently at God's great Judgment Seat."
Posted by Dinah on January 31, 2003, at 21:05:59
In reply to standing by my view » OddipusRex, posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 20:15:28
This kind of reminds me of the midget thread a while back. And yes, humor about groups does make me uncomfortable. Am I overly sensitive? If I am, I'm not going to apologize for it.
I know that "rednecks" are considered fair game for jokes. They aren't a recognized minority. The ones I know don't really mind and even find it funny, but that doesn't mean I'd use the term or make the jokes anyway. It's not really something they have a whole lot more control over than little people or people of color. I suppose that they could try to move up the social caste system, but why should they have to? To be more acceptable in the eyes of the majority? My mama taught me that you don't make fun of anyone, especially about something they can't change.
I always apply the word substitution test. Would it be funny if you substituted a vulnerable recognized minority group? If not, then perhaps it shouldn't be said.
Perhaps I am sensitive to this fact because some of my best friends married people who might be classified as rednecks. But it wouldn't make any difference. I would feel the same way about Ukrainian jokes, especially made by non-Ukrainians.
So Oddipus, while no one was trying to be unkind to you or to this social class, I'm sure, please don't feel that you are to be censured for caring. I admire it in you. And when people call you over-sensitive, say "Thank you" very politely. Because it's not a crime to be sensitive to the feelings of others.
(By the way, I also see practical jokes as socially accepted forms of aggression, so feel free to tell me that I have no sense of humor. I'm comfortable with that. :) )
Dinah
P.S. Didn't the term redneck come into being because the people were out working or playing in the outdoors a lot? Hardly a badge of shame.
Posted by jay on January 31, 2003, at 21:20:11
In reply to Re: standing by my view - Oddipus Rex please read, posted by Dinah on January 31, 2003, at 21:05:59
Dinah:
Well, first off, 'rednecks' aren't a social class, and they aren't a racial class. The term is used for someones social and political values. I *will not* apologize for calling somebody ignorant who thinks a certain race of people should sit in the back of a bus. I *will not* apologize for someone who believes women should be subjected to 'second class citizens', and belong 'in the kitchen and pregnant'. AND..I *will not* apologize for persons who think they have a right right to physically beat a child.
This has *nothing* to do with race, colour, sexual orientation, etc. It has to do with a group of people, a type of person, who believes in the above, based solely on their political and social views. Now *do* you understand?
Jay
Posted by mikhail99 on January 31, 2003, at 21:28:35
In reply to Re: My dear Ms IsoM, posted by justyourlaugh on January 31, 2003, at 19:30:42
> wow,
> can i post about the weather?
>
> i just ordered a pizza with african american olives on it-want a slice?
> j:-) (good one!)
Posted by mikhail99 on January 31, 2003, at 21:32:11
In reply to Re: standing by my view ... » Dinah, posted by jay on January 31, 2003, at 21:20:11
Posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 21:34:06
In reply to standing by my view » OddipusRex, posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 20:15:28
She aptly pointed out the difference between a "light hearted" joke & a derogatory one. She could see the difference. I can see the difference. Others can see the difference. You can't. It's like explaining colour to a colour-blind person.
Are you suggesting that I am somehow defective? I believe I CAN see the difference. Please don't make judgments about my ability to discern between light-hearted humour and derogatory jokes. Perhaps I am not the one who is unable to see colour. That statement caused me a lot of pain. I don't think because I disagree with you, I am somehow not as discerning as you and the "Others" you speak for.
> - - - -
>
> "> I take it that you're actually serious about your post. May I suggest finding something more pressing & serious that needs guidance or correction?
>
> No please don't suggest that. It would make me feel put down. Please don't make judgments about whether my concerns are pressing or serious."
>
> I'm really astounded now. Would you really feel put down by my suggestion?*yes*
If someone said it to me (& they have), I wouldn't feel put down.
*But I am not you and I don't want to become more like you.*
I'm not so sensitive that every passing comments going to make me feel belittled. I feel much more happy with myself than that. And I don't ind sensible suggestions from others. It's those sort of suggestions that have helped me to grow & mature over the years.
> - - - - - -
>
> You're completely missing the point about the humour. It's not making fun about PEOPLE - it's making fun about the ideas of what may be polite. The ideas of etiquette can be quite amusing. I simply used the term Redneck Etiquette as that's how it was emailed me by a friend. I never in a thousand years thought anyone would get righteous over that term.
.........
I'm not "righteous" if you meant to imply self-righteous. I believe I'm right or I wouldn't have bothered to post.
How about if I call it Backwoods Etiquette? But wait - I live in near a heavily wooded area. That's not meant to be trite. I'm trying to get the point across that the humour is about *etiquette*, not *people*!
...........
Then why was it necessary to label it with a particular ethnic group? Are jokes about Jews being greedy about "personality traits" and not "people"? I don't think so!
> - - - - -
>
> And guess what? I do get upset when certain animals are unfairly maligned. I hate the wolf, the hynaena, the wolverine, spiders, & many bugs been shown as repulsive. I happen to like them. But I'm not chastising others about their idea of them. Yes, animals count. Not on the same level as people, but respect for all life is important & would go a long way to preserving our earth. But animals vs people is besides the point. And I'm sorry you didn't understand what I meant by it.
> - - - - -I think I did understand. Very well. I like animals too. But I don't compare defaming animals with defaming ethnic groups.
.............
> I don't mind you sticking to your principles. But I will stick to mine too & I stand by my comment that I see no harm in it. You do. End of discussion.
.............
But it harmed me. So there is *some* harm in it isn't there?
>
>
Some people, if they don't know you just can't tell them. Louis Armstrong?
>
Posted by Dinah on January 31, 2003, at 21:34:24
In reply to Re: standing by my view ... » Dinah, posted by jay on January 31, 2003, at 21:20:11
Actually, Jay...
The term refers to the working class I'm sure you don't mean to disparage. The term comes from the fact that they work in the sun, on fishing boats for example, and they play in the sun, hunting for example. So yes, the term does refer to a social class. You're born to "redneck" parents in a "redneck" area and go to "redneck" schools.
And the schools aren't great. That's partly due to the distribution of wealth amongst school districts. And it's partly do to the lack of emphasis placed on education by the parents, who figure their kids can do manual labor the way they did. It's hardly the kids fault, and it's hardly the fault of the adults who grew up in this environment. Are they "ignorant"? I suppose you could say so, in that ignorant means unaware of facts. Should they be despised for it. NO!!! Should people only be respected if they have a good degree? Should people only be respected if they take on a certain world view that comes with a certain education and a certain social class? NO!!!
Please don't make assumptions about groups of people you don't know. I know quite a few people who would class themselves as "rednecks" who don't beat their children or their wives.
I'm not going to say any more.
Posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 21:46:10
In reply to Re: standing by my view ..., posted by Dinah on January 31, 2003, at 21:34:24
Thanks for your posts. I agree with you. I hope this isn't making you feel as horrible as it is making me feel. I will never apologize for standing up for the victims of bullies. And I think bigotry is bullying on a grand scale carried out by small minded people.
You're a good person, Dinah. It takes a lot of courage to stand up for an unpopular group.
Posted by Dinah on January 31, 2003, at 21:58:12
In reply to You're right Dinah » Dinah, posted by OddipusRex on January 31, 2003, at 21:46:10
Please don't feel awful about it. I know that's easier said than done. :) But please don't. I'm afraid I don't feel awful about things like this anymore. I say what I feel and realize that not everyone will understand my viewpoint or agree with me. But that doesn't stop me from saying it.
Nobody thinks less of you for doing what you think is right. And I don't think anyone here is trying to be unkind. It'll be okay, really.
(((Oddipus Rex)))
Now don't go leaving us over this, hear?
With admiration right back at ya.
Dinah
Posted by jodie on January 31, 2003, at 23:45:06
In reply to Re: Oddipus Rex, posted by Dinah on January 31, 2003, at 21:58:12
Whoa...heated conversation.....
You know, I remember I would never touch my dads keys when a was a little girl. I would catch him sticking a key in his ear to clean it. I remember my mom used to yell at him to stop, and I told him it was disgusting. I guess by reading the "jokes" I'm labeled as coming from a "redneck" family? I dislike being labeled anything. I am a blonde, so I hate those blonde jokes.
Lets just think about what we type, before doing so!!!!
Can't we all just get along? :-)Jodie
Posted by shar on February 1, 2003, at 0:10:59
In reply to Redneck Etiquette Rules, posted by IsoM on January 31, 2003, at 15:19:57
I've never done much reading or research on the phenomenon of humor, but I've heard that one thing that's funny is something unexpected (like in slapstick, the banana peel).
In jokes, there always seems to be a target of some sort. Even if we watch the Cosby show (not a joke in the strictest sense), the funny parts are the exaggerations that one does about another (like the parents reacting to the teenagers). Whether or not something is explicitly stated, there is a target (like, Bill Cosby doesn't turn to the audience and say "this is a joke about teenagers") but, in reality, that's what it is.
I'm trying to think of an actual joke that doesn't have a target. Anybody know one?
The redneck joke Iso posted I've seen versions of as a Texan joke and a Kentuckian joke. I wonder if it is still offensive if it's about Texans? Because, in itself, "Texan" is not an 'offensive' word. At least, I don't think it is. But, then, I'm a redneck.
Shar
Posted by Dinah on February 1, 2003, at 0:11:34
In reply to Re: The redneck jokes, posted by jodie on January 31, 2003, at 23:45:06
(Chuckle) Well, actually Jodie, I think I could qualify for a few myself. ;)
You mean everyone doesn't set a place for their pup at the table? And before I got married, when my big dogs used to sleep with me, I made sure to vacuum the bed every night. Ummm... it was the little ones at the table though. The big guys couldn't fit on the chairs.
Posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:18:33
In reply to Re: The jokes » jodie, posted by Dinah on February 1, 2003, at 0:11:34
I am engaged, have been for 3 years. We live together. I have 2 large dogs, they sleep in bed with us...hair and all. My pups are part of the family!!! I AINT sleepin without em!!!
Posted by Dinah on February 1, 2003, at 0:23:51
In reply to Re: The jokes--Dinah, posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:18:33
Well, I must 'fess up. When I first got married, my big dogs did sleep with us. They always had slept with me, and it would have been difficult to kick them out as they were older. They had to sleep on my side though (not a problem for them). But when they died, my husband preferred that the new ones sleep beside the bed. The one loves a dog bed, the other prefers the cool floor. Neither of them seem to mind.
Posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:34:47
In reply to Re: The jokes » jodie, posted by Dinah on February 1, 2003, at 0:23:51
By morning time my dogs are on the cool floor. Sometimes, I have to admit, I kick (not literally) them off the bed. But I also have 2 cats. One of them thinks he has to sleep on my neck for some odd reason. A queen size bed, two humans, 2 dogs, & two cats, it gets a little crowded!!! I've tried the dog bed thing, for some reason my smallest cat is the only one who uses it, and the bed is for an 80 - 100 lb. dog!!! Samantha (the cat) is, oh, about 5 lbs.
Posted by Dinah on February 1, 2003, at 0:39:07
In reply to Re: The jokes, posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:34:47
I can picture you all in my mind.
I used to have a wee little dog who slept on the small of my back. I learned to sleep without moving, and to this day I have to wake up to turn over.
Posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:49:03
In reply to Re: You paint a charming picture. » jodie, posted by Dinah on February 1, 2003, at 0:39:07
When my cat is laying on me, I try not to move, so I don't disturb him. I end up in these really funny positions, trying to make room for the pets. It's so kind of the dogs and cats to let us share "their" bed with them. Except when my dogs have gas (uhhhh it is horrible), I have to claim the bed back!!!
Posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:53:56
In reply to Re: Sleeping as still as possible--Dinah, posted by jodie on February 1, 2003, at 0:49:03
My fiance' is having a sleep study tonight, so I get the bed all to myself, along with the dogs & cats of course. Sjynja (pronounced Sinja) and Tyson, the dogs, are on the bed getting it warmed up for me now. They pretty much tell me when its bed time, and its almost 2 am here!
Good night!!!!!!
Jodie
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