Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 1106804

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My therapist might be sick

Posted by Allisonfly on November 17, 2019, at 0:12:54

Hi Everyone! Its been many years since Ive posted to this board. It looks like there are a lot of good conversations going on.

Im looking for some advice and support. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder many years ago and have been seeing the same therapist for 25 years. In our last session, I had an unusual experience. She took a call during my session because it was from her doctor and she was waiting to get some test results. I know its not cool to take a call during a session but I didnt really mind bc it was important. The problem was that I could overheat bits and pieces of the call. Im worried she might have cancer. I dont know for sure, and she may not even know at this point, but I dont know what to do. Ive been in a very unstable depressed state throughout the fall and I really rely on her. Of course I dont want her to be sick not only bc of my own needs but also for her sake and her family. I have been really anxious about this all week. I have been trying to practice mindfulness. But there are times I just cry.

I am thinking I will talk to her when I see her next week but I feel weird about it. I dont think its appropriate for her to tell me what is going on with her medically but then again I dont know what to do. Any thoughts would be most appreciated!

Thanks!

 

Re: My therapist might be sick » Allisonfly

Posted by alexandra_k on November 17, 2019, at 6:08:50

In reply to My therapist might be sick, posted by Allisonfly on November 17, 2019, at 0:12:54

People don't post very much to the boards anymore so I'm not sure how many responses you will get.

I suppose I wouldn't have asked at the time, either, I would have thought it wasn't really my business...

Only, I guess it is my (your) business if it impacts on sessions. 25 years is a long time to build a relationship with someone. It may have been her way of her starting to raise something with you...

I hope she is okay, too.

Let us know?

 

Re: My therapist might be sick » alexandra_k

Posted by Allisonfly on November 17, 2019, at 18:17:48

In reply to Re: My therapist might be sick » Allisonfly, posted by alexandra_k on November 17, 2019, at 6:08:50

Thank you so much for your post Alexandra. You are right that I feel like it isnt really my business and yet it kind of is if she needs to take a leave or retire. Most of all Im just worried about her. We have been working together for so long and she has helped me more than anyone else in my life outside of my husband. I dont want her to be in pain or be sad. Well, I see her this Wed so I will address it then.

You are also right that maybe we should start talking about termination at some point. She is close to retirement age and occasionally we will address that. I need to get myself prepared to move on. But 25 years is such a long timeI have worked with her for 1/2 of my life.

Thanks so much for listening! I will read more posts here and try to provide support too. 💛

 

Re: My therapist might be sick » Allisonfly

Posted by alexandra_k on November 22, 2019, at 7:25:59

In reply to Re: My therapist might be sick » alexandra_k, posted by Allisonfly on November 17, 2019, at 18:17:48

Yeah, I think it kind of is your business if it impacts on your future work with her. I remember when my therapist told me his wife was going to have a baby. I felt like it was a violation of boundaries, somehow, and actually more information than I needed to / wanted to know. But it explained why he was going to take a month off after the birth when the precise day of the birth wasn't known in advance.

It is sweet of you to care about her. Maybe she just needed to be updated about switching to more specific antibiotics, or something like that.

Sending warm vibes both of your way.

 

Re: My therapist might be sick » alexandra_k

Posted by Allisonfly on December 4, 2019, at 0:02:14

In reply to Re: My therapist might be sick » Allisonfly, posted by alexandra_k on November 22, 2019, at 7:25:59

Hi Alexandra, Im so sorry for not responding right away. I hadnt checked the board in a little while and just signed on and saw your message. Thank you so much.

I totally get that when your therapist tells you things that seem to shake up the boundaries a little and then it gets weird. Like when you said your therapist told you about his wifes pregnancy. But you are right in that his leave was going to affect you. Thats what I kept saying to myself a few weeks agoI tried being mindful in the moment (Im not always great at that!) and just say if she needs to take a leave she will tell me when it is time.

As it turned out we addressed it in the next session and she told me she was glad about the mindfulness practice that she felt conflicted about whether to let me keep doing the right thing or to ease my mind by telling me what she was dealing with was not life threatening. Which in itself told me she was ok. But Im slowly getting how to handle these things, I think. Relationships with anyone are always hard but the therapy relationship can be especially weird! I could go on and on about that!

Thank you for your support and happy holidays!

 

Re: My therapist might be sick

Posted by alexandra_k on December 13, 2019, at 4:00:04

In reply to Re: My therapist might be sick » alexandra_k, posted by Allisonfly on December 4, 2019, at 0:02:14

Hey, glad to hear that she is going to be okay, and that your relationship is going to be okay, too.

Happy holidays to you, as well.


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